A Little Dabble...Do Ya?
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How many times have I started something, only to give it up 3 to 6 months later? And, to make things worse, like an amnesia survivor, I have absolutely no memory of why I stopped. I am only left with regret and a lingering annoyance with my seeming inability to “stick with something.” Does this happen to you?
Take yoga, for example. Armed with my cheery pink yoga mat and dressed in cozy yoga pants, I twisted, balanced, and held challenging poses with the best of them. I enjoyed it immensely and felt good after every class. One year later, I woke up and realized that at some point, I had stopped practicing yoga. What happened? How did that drop out? What changed? What is wrong with me?
Or, there was my commitment to start the day early. I loved it! Each day began easily before anyone in the house was stirring. I had plenty of time to check my emails before rousing the kids, making the lunches, delivering them to school and starting my work day. Fabulous! This would last forever, right? Wrong. I think that lasted for about 7 ½ weeks.
So what is this about? Why are we unable to sustain new patterns, at times? Or, should the question be; why do we feel we have to? In looking more deeply, I realize that I hope to stick with new patterns because I want to cross things off my list - FOREVER. After all, wouldn’t it be great to cross the whole dirty business of Exercise off the list? Whether it is yoga, biking, jogging or aerobics, my deepest wish is that I would settle into something and be done – really done. I imagine people asking, “How do you stay so fit at age 92?” And I reply with pride, as I balance on one finger; “I have been practicing yoga for 50 years and I have never missed a day!”
But maybe that’s not how life is? Perhaps, we are dabblers at heart. Is it the variety that is interesting? We dabble in meditation, art, reading and organization. We learn a language and then we don’t practice it and forget. Last year I dabbled in healthy lunches for the kids. I bought a dozen books and learned to hide spinach in Jello and lentils in home-made cookies. Yum! I thought it would last forever (My children imagined this also, to their dismay.) But, after awhile, I just stopped. Like a jilted love
left with no explanation, my healthy lunch cookbooks lay disillusioned on the kitchen counter. Did I lose interest in keeping my kids healthy? No, but I lost interest in the process. It was time to move on and learn something new. It was time for me to dabble in something else.
So, here’s to the dabblers! Try things out for awhile. Enjoy the variety. Become a Jane of all trades and master at none. Sometimes, a little dab’l do ya.
1. Choose something to dabble in. Don’t commit to forever, just commit to what you enjoy.
2. The next time you stop doing something, acknowledge yourself for having tried it and move on. Support your own curiosity.
3. Make a list of all of the things you have dabbled in over the years and celebrate. You have accomplished, a lot!
Article author
About the Author
Prior to becoming a coach, Ms. Tenzer worked as a talent executive and producer in the television industry. During those years, she found that one of the most meaningful aspects of her work was the opportunity to coach her team members and colleagues as they faced and overcame challenges in the workplace.
It was this enthusiasm for coaching that inspired her in 2001, to establish Life Works Coaching, a company dedicated to serving busy women.
Ms. Tenzer is a busy woman living in Los Angeles with her husband and three children.
Member: International Coaching Federation, Producers Guild of America, Academy of Television Arts and Sciences.
For more information and to schedule a complimentary coaching session, please email: tenzer@lifeworks4ucoaching.com.
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