Am I good enough?

Many of us suffer from low self-esteem. We may perform well in our work, have good relationships, and on the whole, have a pretty great life. But still, there is this niggling feeling inside us that comes up every now and then, and it tells us, "I'm not good enough".

It may not make any sense at all. For Mary (not her real name), a client that came to me recently, she said that she often got praises from others about her work. Yet, that voice inside her will continue to bug her, reminding her that she is not good enough, even if this is not reflected in her reality.

During our session, Mary told me that she had this feeling of fear of not being good enough in her solar plexus, and when I asked her to tune into it, she said it looked like a "grey lump". With the use of EFT, we traced this grey lump to its origins, and Mary recalled a long-forgotten memory of her at age 12, being told by her dance teachers that she wasn't good enough.

Even though it was an incident that occurred decades ago, when Mary tuned into the memory, she still felt the sadness and anger that came as a response to those hurtful words, and tears came into her eyes. As we tapped on these emotions, she felt her mirgraine coming on and pains appearing in her back, neck and shoulders. Mary originally came to me for her migraines and it appeared that the migraines were connected to this old memory of being made to feel not good enough, showing once again how unresolved emotions can cause physical pain in us.

Fortunately, with continued tapping, the pains dissipated and the emotions cleared. As a test, I asked Mary to say the words "I'm not good enough". She said the words, and immediately after that, she said, "That's bullshit!" She was so shocked by her own spontaneous reaction that she started crying, as she couldn't believe that after so many years of believing that she wasn't good enough, she could finally release this untruth and be completely free from it.

How many of us may still harbour this belief about ourselves, as a result of insensitive, hurtful remarks from thoughtless teachers, caregivers and friends from the past? Even if today, inspirational teachers and gurus teach us to think positively about ourselves, and we try our darnest best to replace our negative thoughts with positive ones, as long as we never heal the wounds from the past, it would always be a struggle to believe that we are good enough.

So I invite you to take a moment now and say the words to yourself "I am good enough". As you say these words, tune into how your body is feeling and check how this statement resonates within your body. On a scale of 1 to 10, how true does this statement feel?

If it is anything less tha
10, then I invite you do the following exercise for yourself:

Tapping on the Karate Chop point, say "Even though I don't feel that I am good enough, I deeply and completely accept myself anyway, and I choose to forgive all the people in my life who have told me that I am not good enough, and I let go of my emotions connected to these people, and I am ready to see the truth about myself, that I AM good enough."

Tap on the remaining EFT points noticing the thoughts and emotions that arise as you do so. Finish off by tapping 2-3 rounds of the EFT points and saying "I am good enough and I love myself" at each point.

Just a note, self-worth issues can be cleared with EFT but it does take persistence if you are doing it on your own. If you would like to improve your self-esteem more quickly, you may want to consider scheduling a session with me so that we get to the root of the problem more quickly. Email me at lena@lenashealinghaven.com to arrange for a session.