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Coping With A Break Up - 9 Real Bites Of Advices For A Happy Coping

Topic: DivorcePublished December 23, 2010

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When you are slowly coping with a break up, it is normal that you will be expressing the negative feelings inside you.You may want it expressed on a paper writing anything and everything about your feelings. You may even want to put it into writing through blogs. You can even punch your pillows many times and as harder you can while crying. Some will just keep quiet; others would go to an isolated place, and shout. When your relationship started in romance and passionate intimacy, it can actually end with intense pain in your heart.The pain is mostly associated with things you never expected to happen but it came suddenly like a thief in the night. We feel so down and lonely right after the break up, and this is a normal response from a person whose heart is broken. Actually, different people from different relationships have different responses in break up and have different ways on how to deal with it. Most often, your heart needs time before it will completely heal.For sure, there comes a point in your life that you will feel depressed and you are still longing to him.You look back at the times both of you shared; you browse your pictures together and wish things will be the same. You let your tears flow not because of him but because of the relationship.You want to actually forget him and even the good memories you shared, but you just cannot. When you officially separated, as in back to being single again, it also means that you will also break those emotions. When emotions are kept and left unchecked, more negative emotions will invade your heart such as hatred, jealousy, anger, revenge depression, loneliness, hopelessness and suicidal attempt. I understand that coping with a break up is difficult to do. Life will never be the same; your eating and sleeping pattern will really change. You are emotionally drained and your emotions are irrational anymore. But, whatever it takes, you must learn to find ways on how to deal with the problem maturely. As such, below are the steps towards effective and happy coping: • Accept the break-up. Letting go of all the pains and all those negative feelings as you struggle to cope up is one best thing to do after the break up. Do not expect that the break up can be resolved by a miracle. It will be harder for you when you think that way. Learn to deal with acceptance that you and him are over, and so as the relationship. • Be forgiving.This is not an easy thing to do as you are still on the process of pain and hurt. But you know, what is good in forgiving is that your heart and mind will be free of pain. It can help you become a positive person and allows you keep the faith that there are beautiful things waiting for you. • Self-respect. Do not think that you are to be blamed of the break-up. So never ever prevent yourself in doing things that you enjoy. Eat and sleep right, and enjoy your self with friends. And, you should never ever do suicide just to end life because of break up. Life is not the end even after break up, time will come that you will see someone better and who will love you just the way you are. Love yourself and allow to be loved again. • Have a great time with your family. Your boyfriend might have left you but never your family. This is the great time to realize that no other person that can give you great love, only God and Your Family. • Feel Blessed. Even if you lost someone, feel blessed that your family and friends are still there for you. • Allow yourself to heal. Time will heal all the wounds so don't suddenly jump into a new relationship. Give yourself time to think about all the things that happened in the relationship and learn to cope up as you will be able to say to yourself that you are completely healed and ready for another person to come. • Refocus your attention. This is done through finding a new hobby to forget him. • Learn to be positive. Even if the painful feelings are invading your system, don't give up, let it go and be able to keep the faith that life is still beautiful for you. • Learn the process of moving on. To move on means to plan for your life, to do the possible things you love. Share those plans with your families and friends that you trust and love big time. Healing can be fast when you know how to express your feelings positively and share your plans. True enough, love is the best and most powerful emotion. We have been so bombarded with stories about love that it can make all things possible because of it. From the break up, you got hurt because you loved; sometimes, you are blinded with so many things because of love. You forgive and forget because of love. Love can make it happen: coping with a break up. Love can give you all the possible emotions therein. But, love must not keep you blind on things you ought to know. Never allow love to hinder you in moving on.

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