Divorce As Friends

n You can divorce as friends! Sound impossible? Well, it's not! Youn have everything you need to heal your relationship. You just need to learn how. Maybe you'll fall back in love and stay together in a way that works. Maybe you'll need ton go your separate ways. Whatever happens, you can be free of the hurt and the turmoil. You can restore your peacen of mind and get on with your life. If you decide to go your separate ways, you can save a fortune in atto ey fees, not ton mention all the pain and suffering that normally accompanies divorce. The key to healing your relationship, and having it work, is you. How you interact towards the other person determines how that person will interact towardsn you. How you interact towards each other determines whether your relationship will ben painful or supportive. Once you discover your role in the conflict, you can do something about it. Unfortunately, we seldom notice that we have anything to do with what is happening. All wen can see is how the other person treats us. We then treat the other person accordingly. If we receive love and appreciation, we'll give love and appreciation. If we receiven criticism and resentment, we'll give criticism and resentment. We treat the other personn according to how that person treats us. The problem with this is that the other person is doing exactly the same thing. Thatn person treats you according to how you treat him or her. When you treat each other based on how you get treated, there is no telling what willn happen. It's like sailing with no one at the helm. When no one is in charge of the ship,n you're likely to end up on the rocks. Usually it's just a matter of time until someone gets upset. That person then puts up hisn or her walls of protection and either resists, attacks or withdraws. Then the other personn gets upset and does the same thing. Then the first person gets more upset and reacts moren forcefully toward the other. Without knowing, you create a cycle of resisting, attacking and withdrawing from eachn other. This cycle of conflict then continues on and on without either person ever noticingn his or her role in the problem. Sides get drawn and issues become something to fight over rather than something ton resolve. Walls of protection get fortified and distance grows. The experience of loven quickly fades away. We hurt each other over and over again, feeling fully justified for everything we do. Serious damage is done, and none of it is necessary. Two people are required in order to create and maintain this cycle of conflict. Only onen is needed to end it. If you want to heal your relationship and be free of the suffering, you need to end thisn cycle. To do this, you need to interact in a way that puts water on the fire instead ofn more fuel. You need to put the focus on healing your relationship, not necessarily as husband andn wife, but as one human being to another. To the extent that you are able to do this, you gain cooperation instead of resentment. Issues get resolved quickly. You become free inside and able to get on with your life. What you do today determines what will happen in your relationship tomorrow. Whether you relationship is painful or supportive is up to you. The choice is yours. To end the cycle of conflict and to heal your relationship, there are basically two stepsn that you need to take: (1) You need to find and heal the inner issues that create your hurt, fuel the conflictn and cause any hanging on. (2) You need to release any upset, resentment, blaming or hanging on that you may haven towards the other person. Once you do this, everything seems to change. With the fear and upset gone, you see you situation differently. You can see what needs to be done and you can interact in a wayn that is very effective. You can end the conflict and restore the love, one human being ton another. As you end the conflict and restore the love, one human being to another, everything elsen takes care of itself. Either you'll stay together in a way that works or you'll part asn friends, being fully supportive of each other. nn nn Click here to learn more about how ton divorce as friends. For more support, consider having an Individual Telephone Consulting Sessionn with Bill Ferguson or a member of his staff.