Giving Ourselves Permission

How many times have you wanted to do something in your life, such as a trip, go to a program, visit a friend, and for whatever reason, you told yourself no… I cannot do this.

Why, I wonder do we do this? We take away what joy, passion or experience our spirit wants to have. We do not give ourselves full permission to be a certain way in life, do certain things, or have experiences which will really make our heart sing.

Why if we have such a desire to do something, do we take away our permission? I’ve come to the conclusion that we don’t give ourselves permission for several reasons. They are:

Guilt – we wouldn’t want to have too good a time, or spend money that may take away from another

Worry – if I do this, how will someone in my life feel?

Limiting Beliefs – we never saw ourselves living our life in a particular way, so we discount the possibility or opportunity

Time or Money – these are just excuses for not allowing ourselves whatever it is we want

We may take away our permission in several ways. We say, “No I can’t do this, before really exploring the possibilities of doing it.” We may say, “My spouse won’t allow me to go.” “My kids won’t understand if I am gone for so long or I do something for myself.” “My kids need me and I can’t get away.”

When I look at the short list of excuses I’ve heard over the years and some I’ve done myself, I wonder…why do we get caught in looking for permission from others? The number one answer I have is, fear. If we allow ourselves to do what we really want or are passionate about, what does it say about us? What does it say about our beliefs around life or marriage or parenthood that we created for ourselves?

The next time you find yourself saying, “No, I can’t do this…” ask yourself, why not? What am I not allowing in my life? Once you come up with some answers, ask yourself what belief you’re holding on to which makes you limit yourself. Once you come up with the belief, change it by coming up with an affirmation that allows you to begin to think differently for yourself. You may also bring in additional support from those around you, who will question why you are not doing something you really desire.
Give yourself permission…it is amazing when we take off our self-imposed limitations and really enjoy our life.