How resilient are you?

How resilient are you? We all experience stressors everyday - they are unavoidable. The key is how we respond to life's challenges. With the help of some good coping skills, you can learn to bounce back from difficult life experiences and become more resilient. Take this quiz to see how resilient you are at this time in your life. If you discover you are less resilient that you would like to be, read my article Bouncing Back for 10 tips to help you build your resiliency. 1. You discover that you are passed over for a promotion at work. You…

• feel devastated. You are doomed to be stuck in this position for a lifetime. You dread going to work from now on.
• feel angry and cheated, but vent about it and then let it go.
• feel disappointed. You talk with your boss and take the opportunity to learn how to be more effective and improve yourself so you will be a better candidate next time.

2. It has been a long and difficult week and you are exhausted.

• You go about your typical weekend chores and responsibilities – somebody has to do it. What's the use, you never have time for yourself.
• You wish you could take some time to yourself. Perhaps you can sneak in an hour for yourself during the weekend.
• You decide to take the weekend (or a day) to have fun and nurture yourself.

3. A storm moves through your neighborhood and a downed tree falls on your house. You…

• are reminded that these things always seem to happen to you… maybe you are cursed. You dwell on your bad luck for days or weeks.
• spend some time fretting and getting angry before you go about taking care of repairs.
• You feel grateful that no one was hurt. Then you assess the damage, plan for the repairs, and then take action.

4. Things are difficult at work and the tension level is unbearable. You are thinking about looking for a new job, but you also have a lot of stress at home right now. You…

• mull things over and are determined to figure this out on your own. You don’t want to burden anyone.
• have some friends that you consider calling, but only if it gets too bad.
• you call in the troops – your circle of friends – to help you sort through your options.

5. Relaxation is…

• huh? You don’t remember what that even feels like.
• something you get to do once a year on vacation.
• a familiar concept. You practice relaxation techniques regularly.

6. You have a plan for a project you are working on, but you have hit an obstacle. You…

• get frustrated and decide it is time to quit this project anyway.
• get mad and keep pushing and pushing until you finally decide to try something different.
• look for alternative solutions. Who knows you may discover a better way.

7. A natural disaster has struck your neighborhood. Everything is a mess, including your house. You notice some kids and dogs romping and playing with each other as if there wasn’t a care in the world. There are some adults supervising and laughing at the sight of the play. You…

• scoff at the group of people… there is so much work to be done there is no time for fun.
• barely notice because you are hard at work, but you manage to crack a smile.
• you stop working for the moment and join in. You laugh and enjoy the humor in the moment. Laughter helps any situation.

8. You were in a car accident and you broke your leg.

• You are angry and can’t understand why such things happen to you. Your higher power must be punishing you.
• You feel down because you will be laid up for a few weeks, but at least you will have some time to rest and maybe reconnect with your spirituality.
• You realize that everything has a purpose – even this accident. You trust that you can find deep meaning in every situation.

9. You have had a rough year, with a lot of difficult situations. Your attitude…

• is pretty sour. It is hard to be positive when bad things happen.
• has taken some hits, but hasn’t taken a complete nose dive either. You are working on it.
• has remained mostly positive. You can’t change what has happened, but you can at least maintain your positive attitude.

10. You have just ended a long-term relationship and you are feeling sad. You…

• keep your pain and sadness to yourself. You feel depressed and withdraw from the world and wallow in your sadness and lonliness.
• casually talk about your situation to a friend, but don’t feel completely comfortable opening up.
• you talk about your feelings with your close friends. You always feel better after you talk things over and you have several friends you can count on when things get tough.

Mostly A’s – Yikes! You are not coping well with the challenges of life. You are likely feeling highly stressed and overwhelmed. One stress leads to another and you are unable to recover in between. While you may be struggling now, you can turn this around with some new coping skills. Be sure to seek out information and training on developing healthy coping skills. With practice you can become resilient. Mostly B’s – You have some good coping skills. It may take a bit, but you bounce back from setbacks fairly well. Try adding some additional coping skills to your repertoire. Remember to make these coping strategies a way of life and you will increase your resiliency. Mostly C’s - You are highly resilient and take advantage of a variety of coping skills. You understand that difficulties happen and that if you use your coping strategies you will bounce back quickly. You have made resiliency a way of life. Keep up the good work!