Article

Just a Friend or What

Topic: AnxietyPublished October 24, 2012

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So many in-depth theories as well as hearsay over “who is a match to who.” Are two people better be friends or perhaps can this lead to deeper emotional attachment as lovers and be a subject of every brilliant Asian art? Do we really need to decide for long if one is a friend or a loved one?
We wonder why two people jibe in an instant. Sometimes, we understood this as compatibility and thought that they’d be better off as lovers only because they seem to get along.

Not at all! They’d better be friends, in fact, in most cases such as this. We wonder too why in an instant, when the world is full of strangers, there is a crowd flocking to us despite each member being stranger to one another. This is because, without exerting any effort, we attract who we are. This is friendship when all we just have to do is be ourselves. But then if we attract a set of gay friends, does it necessarily mean that our spouse needs to be gay? If we rock and all the rockers on earth are chasing us, does our romantic partner need to head bang, as well? Definitely not! This is what makes a friend and a love
different despite the fact that husband and wives should be best of friends. Best friend, by the way, is different with friends. And without mind setting and without a bit of an effort, we draw a few closer to us and we also make someone fall in love with us without the person knowing why. Love catches us no matter how elusive we are to love. If one person professes his love to another soul yet would constantly mould her to his standard, then he is not in love. The truth of the fact here is when we are in love with someone, we could not see any flaw in her/him. When everybody else sees a few or a number of them, we can’t just seem to see it. All we knew is that we have been crying because of the pain being inflicted to us yet we wonder why we still see wall paintings as landscaped, clear and well-defined.. Or have been complaining about the same person but would want him/her stay. This is love because if we do not love the person, the last thing we want is to get along with him. We feel it and the other party feels it and all the people who surround us do.

This, however, seldom happens in friendship. Why? With friends, less are dispute because there is the presence of compatibility and not just chemistry. The trouble is when our friends want to change us so we can adapt to who they are. Cannot be! Bottom line is they are not meant for us anyway, because as it has been said, we attract who we are. On the other hand, being dissimilar to each other is what makes marriage terrifying, too. The thought of making the other one our better half which would imply that a completion of us as a whole is a failure with the absence of the other human life that has been existing on earth opposite to us is alarming. But somehow if we come to think of it, we bend subconsciously for the one we love. It is not that because we are happy about it but it seems that our heart grows its own brain in a snap. It has its own reason that if we would only transfer our consciousness to someone else’s body just to see what our own body is doing, we will be surprised that we are happily cooking for someone when we have never tried cooking at all. Or perhaps for a man, what in a world makes him get up excited only because a shopping schedule with his wife is right ahead for the day when come to think of it, not a single item for him is included in the shopping list! And how about his basketball game with his long -time team or friends? For all he knows, this activity is what perked him up for years. And if we marry someone so alike, how can we tell if he is head over heels in love when what he is doing with you is the usual thing he does just like what you do.

Yet, if someone whom we think loves us hates to be with us and would always rush to meeting his friends which happens to happen frequently or we realized that we have never seen him so happy with us as happy as he is with someone or some group of people, then we better wake up from our deep slumber before we die from nightmare!

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