Making a Case for Your Capabilities

Do you ever wonder where it all began? Perhaps you know exactly. Personally, I don’t have a clue but it appears now and again. The cool thing is its changing.

I’m talking about a phenomenon called Arguing for Your Limitations.

It’s an interesting thing to pull apart don’t you think? When do we do it? Where do we talk ourselves out of trying something new because we assume it won’t turn out well?

I’m on a quest to get more people to believe in the limitlessness of their own abilities and I’m beginning with me.

If you think you can do a thing orrn think you can't do a thing, you're right. ~ Henry Ford

For me, the goal is to do this without motivation or willpower. This is not about mind over matter this is about changing a belief.

This is about being conscious about every time I enter a new situation and talk myself out of it immediately or trying it and walking away if it doesn’t turn out exactly as I planned.

I find myself doing it when something mechanical is broken. I just assume that I can’t fix it but that’s changing. The shift began a few years ago when I first moved out to the country. My washer stopped working and I didn’t own a truck to take it to the city for repairs, so I called the manufacturers 1-800 number and explained my predicament and the repair guy thought it was likely the fuse.

I asked if he’d be willing to walk me through it and he did. First I had to pull out the little drawer where you pour in the soap, I had to find a little release button so it simply popped out of its holder. When I got the drawer out it exposed 4 little screws that I had to un-do. Then I was to pop open the front loader door (which meant first finding the emergency release lever in another panel) and once the door was open I had to unscrew 3 big bolts that loosened the front panel from the drum. Then I had to pull another panel off the very bottom, unscrew 2 more little fasteners. Once that was completed the whole front of the machine opened up and exposed the tube that held the fuse. I opened that and sure enough the fuse was burned out. I replaced the 28 cent part and reversed the instructions to close up the machine and it was as good as new.

The first thing I learned was that if I were designing washing machines I would make getting at the fuses a heck of a lot easier than it was on this one. Truthfully though, the fact that it was a little complicated was what gave me the satisfaction in the accomplishment.

This experience has made me a little more sensitive to times where I find myself in a new or uncomfortable situation and I begin arguing for my limitations, It sounds something like this “I’m not good at those types of things”, “I can’t do that”, “that won’t work”, “that’s too difficult” or “it’ll never happen”.

Have you ever used those phrases? I doubt I’m alone here. The truth is that most of us can figure out nearly anything (if we’re interested). The key is to break things down in stages and then take one step at a time.

It’s not so much about accomplishing it as it is about trying. What a shame it is to walk away from something before even making the attempt.

Are there any places in your life where you argue for your limitations?

Perhaps you talk yourself out of trying something because you think you will fail or someone might laugh. Have you ever thought about going to the opposite side of those thoughts and consider – what if you succeed? Or what if you might inspire someone else to try?

I’m learning to flip my initial reaction over in my head and come up with a new statement. For example;
1. “I’m afraid” can become “won’t it feel amazing when I get through this”,
2. “This is difficult” can become “here’s an opportunity to learn something new”
3. “I’m not smart enough” gets turned into “if I break it down into smaller steps I can usually figure out anything”

Another thing I’m watching for are sentences (or thoughts) that begin with Never or Always – these are great places to do some flipping around. So, statements like:
1. “I NEVER win at anything” becomes “I’m ready for my luck to change”
2. “I ALWAYS fail” can turn into “I’m open to recognizing what I’m particularly good at”
3. “I NEVER get promoted” perhaps switches to “I’m going to learn to articulate my abilities and contributions and ask to be compensated for them”.

This is about learning to Make a Case for Your Capabilities instead of Arguing for Your Limitations. And honestly, I can’t think of a downside to the transformation. Are you up for it?

If you’d like some help discovering how to develop these skills check out www.RubyShuze.com.