Metta Sutta for Conflict Resolution in the Work Place

As a corporate wellness program provider I take my work very seriously and try to make sure that each moment is filled with attention to easing tensions and stress both in my business and personal life. This is not to say that I don’t make mistakes. When I become aware of mistakes they are tools for enhancing my practice. I am a hypnotherapist, yoga instructor, and meditation facilitator. Outside of corporate wellness groups I also see clients for private one on one sessions at a healing arts center. Often the healing arts center can become quite busy, which in most cases is a good thing. However, when business picks up beyond the supposed capacity of administrative abilities, tension and stress have the habit of budding their nasty little heads. Fortunately most of the therapists work with the same ideals of open-ness and relaxation as I do, so this makes it a little easier. Every once in a while there is a slip in awareness, and this next story describes what can happen in times of chaos and stress in a workplace where relaxation and stress management is the business.nnSaturday is the busiest day at the healing arts center. Usually the place is booked solid all day with Tai Chi, Chi Gong, and Yoga classes in the studio space, and acupuncture, massage, and hypnotherapy appointments in the therapy rooms. It’s the most exciting time that makes the teachers and therapists feel enriched and alive. The receptionist is usually the busiest, taking calls, booking appointments, registering new clients and students, handling sales from the store, but usually everything runs smoothly as we are all completely engaged with each task and maintain a deep awareness of each other’s tasks and circumstances. Last Saturday was a slightly different case. After taking a lunch break from earlier sessions I walked back into the center and was greeted with a worried look from the receptionist,nn“Umm…Joie,” she asked with a shaky voice. “Did you say you had a client booked in room 1 at 1pm?”nn“Yes, that’s right.” I responded.nn“Well, I don’t know…” she hesitated, “did you place it in the schedule, because I didn’t see it.”nn“Oh, Yes, I scheduled that session long ago and I have an e-mail confirmation of the booking.” I assured her.nn“Well I am not sure what to do now, somehow one of the massage therapists booked a client over yours so that room is double booked,” She looked at me anxiously.nnIt was ten minutes to one and we had to think fast about what to do. The massage therapist walked in at that moment and expressed some frustration. nn“You didn’t book that room, I know you didn’t because I didn’t see it in the books, I looked this morning…” he looked at me aggressively.nnNow, at this moment I became aware of several choices I could make, I could have responded defensively, scurried to find the confirmation e-mail, asserted my history with the center, or passive aggressively asserted my position in some way; I could have also declined and given him the space for several reasons, to be a good Samaritan, to appear bigger in a compassionate way, or because he was more assertive. All of the above choices are a response of the ego, fight or flight. To respond with awareness is another thing all together. I made a suggestion that either of us could take the studio space, since it was free, once we explained to our clients the situation… and basically let the comfort of our clients decide. Initially the massage therapist agreed to this idea but when his client showed first he changed his tune. He explained to me that he didn’t want to make what he thought was a compromise. He continued with a somewhat aggressive tone and insisted that I either re-book or use the studio space without any discussions.nnOverhearing this conversation, his client offered to re-book her session. The problem was solved. However the tensions between he and I were not. In this type of work environment employee relations is extremely important so this tension for me was an opportunity to put some of my skills into practice. I maintained my intention of compassionate communication. With only 3 minutes left before my client arrived, I sat and waited. While waiting, I envisioned him as my friend and repeated the words of the metta sutta* quietly. My client showed up and I began my session. During my session I maintained full attention to my client. More than an hour passed before I saw this massage therapist again. When my client left, the massage therapist was waiting for me outside the session room.nnWhen I saw his worried face…I was a little startled, I too waited for his next comments.nn“Joie, I’d like to apologize… truth is I didn’t look closely at the appointment scheduler. In fact I didn’t look at all. I just assumed it would be free since it usually is at that time.”nnHa, I giggled and laughed. I was happy that in this situation my practice of metta sutta had shown such immediate results. We both laughed and continued on our business. Because of the mutual respect and positive intention we held for the work and each other, this tense and potentially destructive encounter was eased and was in fact, funny. nnFor individual sessions or corporate wellness programs and tips please visit www.bodymindwellness.org.nnnTip: As a Collaborate Effort, Create A Wellness Mission Statement that clearly outlines steps to maintain morale and communication. For a healthy work environment, everyone must be dedicated to maintaining ease, communication, and flexibility in the workplace!nn*Metta Sutta is a Buddhist practice of loving kindness. In this practice the word, “May I be happy, may I be well, may I be free of all enmity, may I be free of ill will against myself.” Are first uttered for the self and then others. Body Mind Wellness is a not a Buddhist organization but uses techniques from several modalities to accomplish wellness goals.n