Permanence : The Story of Who We Are
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PERMANENCE
OUR STORY OF WHO WE ARE
THE ILLUSION
Yesterday opportunities came to visit- opportunities to embrace the ways in which I was introduced to my own assumptions of what would always be? Intellectually, should I be asked-does anything last forever, I would have said no. Quoting those ubiquitous sayings such as " change is all there is", "you can count on change" and many more.
I was surprised at the way hearing about the change- of things I had taken for granted found me unaware; found me unaware of emotional connections in which, somehow, I thought the physical representation of these emotional connections would last forever.
Halfway through my day of celebrating self care, I learned that the home of my daughter's pate
al grandparents was being demolished to make way for a new multi-residential complex. This modest family home in a student community was about to be, literally, removed. Somehow, that memory of a physical place and all its associations; the meals shared, my wedding reception held, the fact that Grandpa built it himself- all these associations carried with them their emotional signature, this physical place existed in my memory, and also in the 3D. They both had an emotional quality of permanence even though intellectually I understood they were not.
All of this and the linkage of two experiences within my body/mind/heart have been whispering in my ear, reminding me that even when we believe something is true, absolutely true, a belief supported by experience, in fact, it may not be so. 42 years ago I experienced a major vertical fracture of my leg and ankle. When it healed, I experienced a diminishment of ankle flexibility, pain on an almost daily basis and restrictions in my physical capacity to run, jump, climb and do extra weight bearing. Years moved on, I had multiple experiences that proved to me that these restrictions were true- I could not run, I could not jump. I showed the physical manifestation of edema that never diminished regardless of the body therapy experienced. After many 3 D confirmations that yes the restrictions were real, yes I could no longer run, no longer jump. Then in August of 2010 Toby Alexander was the messenger of a life changing experience. As part of our Transcendental Rebirthing Certification Training, Level III Toby directed the trainers in a series of physical activities which involved running, jumping jacks, pushups and many other experiences. I shared with him- I don't run, I don't jump and I don't do push ups. My stories of the injuries I had sustained, the restrictions that I experienced and the physical limitations that had become part of my life were shared with him with the certainty born of experiences over an extended period of time, in a variety of settings. Even when doing what I loved, riding horses, I "paid a price" of painful swelling and stiffness. I would have wagered any amount of money that all of this was true - It was my experience, doctors confirmed it etc. My story, my experience, my belief in the permanence of my "condition" was absolute. Were I engage in Byron Katie's Inquiry as ask is this true? YES. Is it absolutely true? YES! So, after sharing my story, and saying no to the activities, I was certain. I knew. My story, my belief was true.
The next day, Toby set us on our morning activities of warm ups. Then he sent everyone out for a run and said, "you're working with me" We went to the end of our street and there in the quiet and the sunshine, he shattered all my beliefs about what I knew, absolutely and unconditionally to be true. He began with a visualization for me of seeing myself doing jumping jacks. With ease, smoothly and effortlessly and then together, we did them. My body was a bit awkward, teaching itself to re-remember the movement- the power was in the experience of the doing, of transforming the impossible into the possible. Then he created a visualization for me of running: effortlessly, smoothly and gracefully. Then he said are you ready and together we ran. That first day, I ran about 100 ft, the next day farther, and the next day farther yet. Imagine! For the first time in 42 years, I was able to run. My belief about what was true, what was permanent collapsed. Without argument, without logic. Toby created the space and the opportunity for me to replace my belief of limitation and permanence with one of possibility.
Do you have such beliefs? Beliefs based upon real experience that you "know" without a doubt are true. I invite you to open to the opportunity to experience that these beliefs can be an illusion. Many of the beliefs you and I have that say Why bother-that's the way it is, that's the way men are, the Church has always been that way, government will never change, I'm a Leo, I'm a morning person, etc. Some of these beliefs, on the surface seem so insignificant, who cares, what's the harm if I say, " well, I'm a Leo, you know we are really strong personalities, "I'm always grumpy when I wake up, I'm not a morning person" All these beliefs, whether it's mine about a physical limitation, or one that describes a behavior such as I'm not a morning person, are beliefs that limit us. They limit us by defining what we do, or who we are.
Wake up, set yourself free, open to the opportunity to review your beliefs, and let go of all that limit and define your possibilities- We all are more than our story .
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