Silent Communication Impacts Relationships

Silent communication affects a relationship with the suddenness of a lightning bolt, the drip, drip, drip of a leaky faucet, or the enduring radiance of a diamond. Look at the examples below, and you’ll see what I mean.

A man slowly moves to one knee, reaches into his pocket, and retrieves a small box. He looks up into the eyes of the woman he loves. In an instant, she realizes what this silent communication means. With the suddenness of a lightning bolt in the nighttime sky, her boyfriend is about to propose marriage.

“Breakage!” I was 16 years old and in my first job when I heard the term. I and a few other employees were taking their “morning constitutional” when a damaged box of donuts was placed on the table in the employee’s lounge. I enjoyed the treat and then went back to work. During the afte
oon break, I saw a senior employee crack open a box of cookies and announce, “Breakage!”

I looked around the room and noticed that a few people ignored the cookies and actually moved to a different table.
The next morning the same thing happened. I asked a co-employee whom I trusted what “breakage” meant. She explained to me that occasionally a package would accidentally be damaged during handling, and “breakage” is an accounting term used to report the loss of the item. She said that several people ignored the senior employee who was intentionally breaking open packages of food because what he was doing constituted an illegal act and fraud against the company.

Drip, drip, drip.

I was a 16-year-old just learning about the working world and I watched the silent actions and reactions that were occurring in the break room. When I began to question the silent communication that I was receiving, I asked someone I trusted to explain it to me. Because of her input, my relationship with that senior employee changed. It takes time to assess the integrity, or lack thereof, of a person. Eventually, the truth surfaces.

A relationship with a spouse or a significant other is a great example of the lure of silence. Over time, we begin to think alike. We begin to anticipate each other’s needs and moods. We know each other’s likes and dislikes. When was the last time you surprised your spouse with a gift of jewelry? You selected the design, and your spouse said, “That’s exactly what I would have picked.” She knows that you were thinking of her first, and that’s more important than the gift itself. She will never forget it. Silent communication impacts a relationship with the enduring radiance of a diamond.