The Most Important Relationship You Will Ever Have - Bar None!

Hello my friend :)

Like me, you must have heard that you can't properly love somebody else until you love yourself.

You may also have heard that you are the most important person in your life!

Well, if you're anything like I used to be, then I'm sure you can't accept those statements any more tha
I could back then. However, 7 years later on, I realise that both of these statements could not be more correct.

If you don't have a good relationship with yourself then the first thing you are going to do with anyone else is to try to get love or attention from THEM. There is a good reason for this. If you are not giving the love to yourself then you MUST get it from somewhere else! Love is like food! It is really hard to think about feeding others if you are starving yourself, and this hunger can really taint the way you feel and it can also make you act in ways that make no sense to you. Your mind can play all kinds of tricks on you and can easily fool you into thinking you the one who is doing all the giving - when in fact you are probably taking far more than you realise!!!

So how do you turn this around? How do you start to give this love you yourself?

It's simple really - it's like any relationship.Start by spending a little quality time with yourself.

I started by going for a walk every morning - nothing too adventurous at first but at least I was doing something for me. Whilst i was walking I was listening to something motivational on my iPod to really take advantage of the time. It's really important for you to recognise yourself and notice that you are spending that time with YOU. I actually say out load - "This is for YOU, this is your time and I'm giving to you because you are valuable". I still do this every time I go for a gym or do anything that is for me. After all, if you have been ignoring yourself for a while then you might need to actually hear that you are important.

I know this may sound a little twee and basic, but sometimes we need to go back to basics to get things right. The most important thing is that your inner self gets the message that you care.

You then need to build this into a daily habit - like cleaning your teeth. I'm sure you wouldn't dream of leaving the house in the morning without brushing your teeth and this is no different. In fact it is infinitely more important.

If you think what I'm saying is too simple then just ask anyone you know who has rock solid self confidence and self esteem what they think about what I'm saying and I dare bet they do this kind of thing naturally. If we love and appreciate ourselves then we naturally feel great.

Now that is just one example. Why not take 10 minutes and write down some more things that you could do for yourself - things that you enjoy, things that make you feel good. Think of some of the things that you happily do for other people, but you don't do for yourself. Hiring a DVD, making a lovely meal, going to see friends or maybe buying yourself a gift. I don't know what things are important to you, but whatever they are, take this time to write them down. Then schedule some time with yourself to do them. Try this - have a little fun with it - that will add to the power of the proccess.

I wish you a fabulous day and I truly hope this is helpful and useful :)

Be great to yourself xx

Tim Neale :)