True Stories of What Not to Say to a Young Adult [or anyone!] with Cancer

We all know that when cancer punches you, everything changes. But think about the changes that blindside young adults, whose challenges and concerns differ so drastically from their elders’. “Will I be able to have children?” “I was just starting to figure out my career and now I don’t know if I’ll have one again.” And after treatment’s ended and you want to put it all behind you, “When do I tell the guy I’m dating that I’m a cancer survivor?” Kairol Rosenthal, a gifted writer who contributed an incisive essay to Help Me Live…, has her own book, Everything Changes: The Insider's Guide to Cancer in Your 20's and 30's, coming out in a couple of weeks, and I’ll be writing more about in future posts. But for now I want to share something created by young adult patients and survivors and produced by Planet Cancer, a site for and about young adults with cancer. It applies to people of all ages when you change the language a bit, and it made me LOL! Enjoy, and please pass along to your friends and family. It will certainly amuse them - and possibly help spare people with cancer from getting yet another kick in the stomach. Always hope,rnLori True stories of what not to say to a young adult with cancer (or else you’ll end up immortalized in print) from Planet Cancer “You are cool for a sick person” “You look really good, for having cancer” “I know someone who JUST died from that kind of cancer.” “What a shame. You are so pretty.” “You have cancer? But I thought your family was like, uber wealthy.” “Quit bullsh**ing, you don't sound sick.” “I wish I could lay around all day. Must be nice.” “I only talked to you because I thought you were a lesbian because of your short hair. It's hard not to cheat on my wife when I'm out of town so I try to stay away from straight women.” “Well, we are all dying. You just happen to know what you are going to die from." “Cancer is God's way of controlling the population.” “Wow. You are living my worst nightmare.” “You’re handling this so well… if I were you, I would be up late at night and thinking of all these doomsday scenarios.” “You know what you should do? (insert crazy dangerous sounding diet here).” “You are so lucky. You're gonna get really skinny with chemo.” “Don’t worry. There's always someone worse off than you are.” Next, another humorous Top 10 list created by young adult patients and survivors:rnTop 10 Worst Responses When Someone Tells You They Have Cancer -- Lori Hope is the author of Help Me Live: 20 Things People with Cancer Want You to Know, and a speaker and communications consultant.rnThis post originally appeared on Lori's CarePages.com blog, "Hope for Cancer: what helps. what hurts. what heals." For more information about how to support someone with cancer, see or LoriHope.com.