What Can You Do When Sex Is Dull

You want more sex but she is satisfied with the current frequency. You have tried everything to get her interested in sex, but to no avail. What is holding her back? What can you do?

There are times in all relationships when sex becomes a little dull or she does not have the same level of desire as you. It sounds as if the responsibility for initiating sexual encounter is falling predominantly on you, the male partner. This may eventually create resentment and frustration in your relationship.

Before allowing the situation to deteriorate further, it is better to have a serious chat with her about how you see your intimate life together. To be a happy married couple involves talking about your sex life to make sure that both of you have a sexually satisfying life.

Here Are Some Ways That Couples Can Spice It Up To Prevent Sex From Getting Dull

So, how do you start communicating for better sex? You can begin by saying that you feel your sexual needs are not being met. The talk should take place under a non-sexual encounter situation and without the kids around. If she is not ready to have this conversation at the moment, ask to make special time for this talk.

During the discussion, you can try to figure out if she understands that you are sexually frustrated and that being sexually compatible is important to you. There is also a need to find out from her about whether she feels pressured to have sex; even when she is too tired or distracted. Ask her how she can show you by words or any other means what feels good to her and whether she is willing to try different kinds of non-risky sex play.

See whether you can dig up anything in her personal history that can affect her sexual desire. Find out if she has any fantasies that she may want to explore and tell her about yours. This communication is just a reality check that something is not working for one of you and there should not be any negative judgment or blaming. Your objective is to want her to be your intimate and erotic friend. She needs to hear these words in order for her to get outside of her comfort zone and learn to become more sexually confident. Nothing will change in your relationship unless both of you are committed to strengthening your sexual connection.

You will not see ove
ight results. But in the mean time, you can gradually get her back in the mood by building intimacy with her. First you need to build and earn trust from her by being positive, supportive, helpful, appreciative and forgiving whenever you can. Surprise her with small gift at times just because you love her. Compliment her for the specific things she have or the things she had done such as her character or her effort in taking care of herself physically. Do let her know how you adore and cherish her and at the same time telling her how important she is to you can make her feel special. You can also be affectionate with her in non sexual ways without any ulterior motive.

It is also important to make an effort to spend time with her in order to strengthen your relationship. Surprise your partner with a long, romantic kiss and a suggestion to take a walk together. Make sure you hold hands while you walk and talk. You can also put a blanket on the floor of your bedroom or go to the park to enjoy an intimate picnic together. You can schedule lunch dates once or twice a week. Whether it is going on a spontaneous trip, attending a dancing or yoga class, hiking, walking on a beach, seeing a romantic movie or concert, reading an erotic novel together, housing a party for friends, etc, having fun together is critical for the success of your relationship.

Also taking more time during foreplay will help her to feel that her needs are being met. Take a night and make it all about her pleasure to show her how great sex can feel. Kissing is probably the most important part of foreplay. Not just kissing her mouth because there is a broad spectrum to choose from her entire body. Use your lips and tongue to show that you will not neglect any part of her. Kiss her ears, eyelids, neck, throat, shoulders, breasts, stomach, back, inner thighs, feet and of course her mouth. When you go through these areas one at a time, you take your time to find out which areas are especially sexually responsive to her by listening closely to her reactions.

Always keep in mind that every woman is different and thus has different preferences. While some women like soft, tender touch, others prefer aggressive forceful behavior or some like it both. With time, you should be able to pick on what she likes through her body language and vocal approval.