What You Do That Sabotages Your Child’s Success

This article is not meant for the weak of heart. It is for those few parents who really want to give their children real advantages and real self-esteem. It is written for those parents who are willing to look at how their parenting can unknowingly be harming their child’s self-esteem. It is written for those parents who want to help their child win, be happy and flourish.

Most parents think that they can influence their child’s confidence by giving their child lots of praise, but the real truth is what truly enables a child to learn what self-esteem and confidence is, is to watch a parent demonstrate it for them.

As a child, there is an unconscious learning process that takes place by observing parents and others, called modeling. It is when your child watches what you do and models the behavior you exhibit. Your child watches you all the time. In fact young children often imitate and emulate what it is their parents say and do and even the physical actions of that parent. By doing this they learn how to act, be and function in the world.

Your child is around your self-esteem level everyday, all the time and your child believes that how you feel about yourself is the standard in the world. If you put yourself down, they learn to make negative self-comments too. If you are a complainer then chances are they are going to be a complainer too. If you have limited negative thinking this too is what they learn.

This is important to understand as a parent because every thought you think has a chemical feeling behind it. For example you think a happy thought and you feel happy. You think a sad thought and you feel sad. Are you teaching your child to have happy thoughts, sad thoughts, angry thoughts, or worrisome thoughts by your modeling it for them? How your child habitually thinks will determine the outcome he has for the rest of his life or until your child intentionally changes it.

You teach your children to have an attitude by modeling your attitude for them. Is it time for you to change your thinking? Do you need an attitude adjustment? Are you positive and upbeat, so your children learn to be? Do you see opportunities so your children see opportunities? Do you worry about life and money modeling and teaching that behavior to your child? Do you have power thinking or do you have quitter mentality? Are you solution oriented or a “sky is falling thinker?” The term is “monkey see, monkey do.” I do not like the use of the word monkey, so, your child sees, your child does.”