***Why You Should be Arrogant

Why You Should be Arrogant

Each of us has something we value that we are devoted to within ourselves, that we are 'better at' than other people are because we pay attention more to that one thing than others do. This is our personal superiority, and by golly, we are entitled to it.

My friend's body does not make serotonin at all. Despite all her university degrees, her exploits as a medic in the military, her awesome ability as an authority in avians for a university, her awesome ability to rescue birds from all sorts of threats, and to train birds to do things they haven't done for anyone else, despite her formidable ability to dance and sing, despite her svelte figure at an age when tubby is the norm, and her thirty-year marriage, she feels intensely worthless at times. Everyone is better than she, and everyone's opinion of her counts 100%.

What she needs is arrogance genes.

Arrogance has a bad rep these days. It is confused with inferiority complex: Those people are amateurs at arrogance, they never get it right. They give us all a bad name.

Really arrogant people are usually generous of spirit. Deep down in their souls they feel blessed with superior something. It could be anything, it doesn't matter what it is. Because they feel this warm sense of superiority, they can afford to respect you for what you are, what you have done (because they feel you are no threat to their standing). Arrogance is essentially an abundance of self-worth.

"You think you are better than everyone else," a person who was dysfunctional (in my opinion, of course) accused. Out of my mouth flew, without checking with brain, "Of course I do; and if you don't think you are better than me, that's your problem."

Our self-worth is often based on our talent, our looks, our position or money, our ability to outfox our friends – whatever. As long as we are comfortable with our values, we can commend others with an open heart.

A princess in Queen Marie Antoinette's court famously said "We declare ourselves beneath whatever we are proud of." She was speaking of noble titles. And she was speaking of the distinction between inferiority complex and arrogance.