Article

Women: How To Stop Starving Yourself Of Success

Topic: Success PrinciplesFeaturing Carol Tavris and Elliot AronsonPublished November 7, 2008

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When we talk about starvation, or eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia, we’re normally referring to behavior relating to food. For example, when someone is said to have the condition called anorexia, we are typically describing a behavior pattern marked by an aversion to or pushing away of food. When someone has bulimia, it typically means behavior characterized by the bingeing and purging of food (gorging on food and then inducing vomiting).nnBut when I first became aware that I was settling for the crumbs of life, I realized that there WAS something else we humans could starve themselves of, and this previously unrecognized method of starvation was affecting tens of millions of people. What no one had considered before was that human beings could starve ourselves of success.nnWomen, since the beginning of human history, have been taught that their worth comes from their physical bodies. Make no mistake about it: a woman's worth does NOT come from her body! However, since the beginning of time, female human beings have been TOLD or TAUGHT – implicitly and explicitly – that their worth stems from their physical bodies.nnSo, let's say you have a human being who has been TOLD since the beginning of time that her worth comes from her physical body (even though it isn't true, it's what she's been TAUGHT). Let's further say that this person develops really low self-esteem and a very low sense of self-worth. So now you have a person who's been TOLD that her worth comes from her physical body… and you add to that a very low sense of self-worth…nnDoesn't it make sense that that person will PUNISH that part of herself that she was TOLD her worth comes from – namely, her physical body? And if you are going to unconsciously punish your physical body, doesn't it make sense that you are going to starve yourself of food?nnI have just shown you, in five sentences, what causes a person to develop an eating disorder.nnThe Other SexnnThat would be, men.nnWhere have men been taught their worth comes from? Men, since the beginning of human history, have been TAUGHT or TOLD that their worth comes from their possessions, titles, job, net worth, holdings, size of bank account – what I call their materialbodies (as opposed to their physical bodies).nnSo, what if you have a human being who has been TOLD since the beginning of time that his worth comes from… not his physical body, but his material body (even though this isn't true, it's what he's been TAUGHT). Let's further assume that this person develops a really negative self-image. Now you have a person who's been TOLD that his worth comes from his material body… and you add to that a very low sense of self-worth…nnDoesn't it make sense that he will punish that part of himself that he was TOLD his worth comes from – namely, his material body? And if you are going to unconsciously punish your material body, doesn't it make sense that you are going to starve yourself of success?nnThe Condition with No NamennnI have just shown you what causes something you've probably never thought about before, because it never had a name before, because no one had ever realized its existence before. And it's called a success disorder.nnWhat is a success disorder? It's what happens when a person develops a deeply negative self-belief – what I call your head trash – and unconsciously develops a pattern of behavior marked by an aversion to or pushing away of success.nnI know this sounds crazy – except to the tens of millions of us who have been doing it our whole lives without knowing it. At 8:20 p.m. on October 20, 1997, I became the first person to realize the existence of a condition that I named success anorexia.nnBecause of this, I also realized that starvation could be related to something other than food – and that tens of millions of people around the world were unknowingly starving ourselves of success – but had no idea that's what we were doing, let alone how to fix the problem.nnThat's when I knew I had to get this information out to the millions of people just like me – people who were unknowingly pushing away the success we were perfectly capable of achieving.nAnd that’s the moment The Secret Code of Success was born.nnBonus Pressures For WomennnDid you notice something about the examples I just showed you? I showed you why people who starve themselves of food tend to be females, while people who starve themselves of success tend to be males. But what if you're a woman who's starving yourself of success? How could that happen?nnThe answer is simple: over the last 50 years, women have entered the workplace in unprecedented numbers. In fact, women now outnumber men in the American workforce, and research shows that women are starting new businesses at a higher rate than men.nnGuess what this means for today's modern woman? In addition to being told that their worth comes from their physical bodies – they're now being told that their worth comes from their material bodies!nnThis means that women now face the dual pressures of having to "look perfect" (physical body pressure – the traditional female measuring stick) while also having to have "the perfect career" and "bring home the bacon" (material body pressure – the traditional male measuring stick).nnKeep in mind that NONE of these pressures are ever spoken of in polite company. They are lurking beneath the surface, never addressed in the open… but always there, affecting millions of women and men not just in this country but all around the world – although very few are consciously aware of it.nnThe bottom line is that today's modern woman can be starving herself of food AND success! Many of my female students have come to me for help because they were holding themselves back from success, and then told me that they were anorexic or bulimic at one time in their lives. Even though you may never have suffered from an eating disorder, if you are a woman, you too are probably facing these unspoken pressures of modern life.nnCopyrighted material courtesy of Harper Collins.nn

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