10 Things Every Preemie Parent Should Know

1. The earliest you can expect to come home is your due daternWhenever you ask this question you will get a "how long is a piece of string" response. It is rare for babies born prematurely to come home before the date they were due. Often it is much longer than this. If the birth was unexpected then you need to plan for this length of time at least. Get your family around you and work out who can do what to support you. Pace yourself to last, not burn out early. 2. Breast is bestrnMaintaining milk supply is even harder for preemie moms than full-term. Preemie mums who manage to breast feed should be given medals, seriously. If the birth was unexpected you may not know anything about breastfeeding. You really need to prioritize this. Talk to lactation consultants. Most NICUs will have them as they understand that the shorter the length of the baby's stay the lower the cost to the hospital. Breast milk has all kinds of properties that formula does not. Even in the hospital, your body will create antibodies in your milk for the pathogens present and place them in your milk. If you don't know what colostrum is yet, find out! Many preemie moms don;t know that it's recommended to express within 4 hours of giving birth. 3. Medical science doesn't have all the answersrnYou are your baby's advocate in the hospital. You need to fight for her. Do not be intimidated by medical jargon. Do not be intimidated by medical staff. Do not be afraid to ask questions and repeat the question until you get an answer you understand. It is your right to see your baby's medical information. 4. Hand-washing is the most important action against infectionrnInfection is Public Enemy #1 in the NICU. Never be afraid to ask anyone about to touch your baby if they have washed their hands. If they say yes, ask them to do them again just to humor you. There's normally an anti-bacterial handwash at the end of every incubator. Make double sure everyone uses it. 5. Kangaroo carernThis is a great activity that many NICUs offer. You lie back in a recliner and place your baby on your chest. They normally cover the baby with a blanket so it's like having your baby in a pouch. This is great for everyone. You will notice your baby's vital signs improve immediately. If you're breast-feeding, there will be an exchange from the skin to skin contact that tells your body what breast milk to produce. 6. Doctors' roundsrnThese are normally to schedule so work out when they are and try to be present. This is often a great opportunity for you to get additional information but be careful to let them discuss what they need to. They will normally have a word with mom and dad after they've finished. Nurses will also do a round as they hand over from shift to shift. it's good to be around for this also. 7. Participate in nursing caresrnBe there as often as you can. Nursing cares like feeding and changing diapers are normally done to a schedule so plan your time around this. Nearly all hospitals will encourage you to give the feed and change the diapers if you're around. After a couple of supervised practices you'll be like a pro. This is a great opportunity for you to get involved and gives you something tangible that you can do for your baby. 8. Environmental considerationsrnMake sure that your baby is getting the best deal in terms of her environment. You probably can't do much about ambient noise but you can control light levels etc. If there's strong overhead lighting your baby might benefit from having a cot blanket placed over the incubator. This is normal but can sometimes be forgotten by the nurse after being removed for feeding etc. If there's a quieter corner, ask if you can move there when that baby moves out. It's well documented that neurological outcomes are affected by these simple factors. 9. Prepare to be clichédrnYou'll get tired of hearing the same old clichés trotted out day after day. The journey is an "emotional roller-coaster". It's "two steps forward one step back" and the old favorite "Every baby is different". Get used to them. There is some element of truth to them. You will have high and low days. You may take a high from something as simple as a bowel movement and the lows are unfortunately numerous. You'll need a thick skin. Fix your mind on an end point : coming home with your baby. Then it's just a matter of digging in and fighting for your baby. 10. Knowledge is powerrnDoctors and nurses despise internet diagnoses. Yet doctors disagree with each other frequently and every NICU operates differently according to their individual philosophies. You won't find two nurses that will follow the exact same procedure to do something as mundane and simple as administer a gavage feed. So, what they each have is an opinion on the best way to do something. So, get on Dr. Google and find out as much as you can about everything that you can. It's frightening and will often draw you to look at worst case scenarios but at least you will have armed yourself with relevant information.