Are You Dissatisfied Enough to Finally Change?
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The world is continually changing around us, as can be witnessed by the events of the past year. You must be willing to change yourself in order to meet the new challenges of today and achieve success.
Unfortunately, change is one of the hardest things for any of us to accept. Much has been written about the need to change and even how to do it. Yet, for most people it still remains an impossible task to change the really big things in life.
Here is the secret about why changes don't tend to stick. People tell themselves they are going to change and even start on the process. However, they don't stick with it. They quickly revert back to the old way of doing things. The reason - they have not yet achieved a high enough level of dissatisfaction with the current situation! Quite simply, they have not yet reached the point where they get mad and say, "I am not going to tolerate this anymore!" Dissatisfaction must be present before change can occur. If you aren't dissatisfied with something, why would you change it?
Think about a time in your life you became so fed up with something that you decided to change it. You said, "That's it, I'm not doing this anymore." Then you set about making a change. Maybe it was your job. You stopped enjoying the work, or the boss - and decided it was time to find a new job. The dissatisfaction was so intense that you just could not stand it anymore. You may have been compelled to change a relationship or your weight or any number of things. Whatever it was, you finally decided to do something about it.
All of us have been in this situation before. It took a lot for us to make a significant change in our life. We had to reach the point where we simply wouldn't put up with the ways things were any longer. It is so easy to want to keep doing what you know how to do; what is comfortable and offers no risk. The issue though is that in order to accomplish the goals you have set out for yourself, you must change.
Attitude is the first step to meaningful change. Before you can expect any meaningful change to occur, you may need to evaluate your attitude regarding change.
In order to prepare for change, you need to create an attitude of change. You must open your mind and broaden your view of how change will improve your situation and move you closer to what you want to accomplish. Accepting that change is a good thing will allow you to remove some of the fear associated with these changes. The good news is that your attitude is in your control. You get to chose what attitude you bring to the change process.
Remove any negativity from your thinking and approach change with a belief that the change will have a positive impact on your goal. Keeping a positive attitude and recognizing the changes are helpful to you will make it much easier to embrace change.
Identify areas of dissatisfaction you need to focus on. What are the specific areas of dissatisfaction that you want to work on? Take stock of all areas of your life. If you are unhappy with your weight, relationships, current job, business results, commute time, exercise habits, money management or other areas of your life, then you will be challenged to achieve your goals unless you are willing to change and do things differently than in the past.
Create a list of things you will no longer tolerate in your life. Start with the heading, "I will no longer tolerate ...," and then list the dissatisfaction attached to each item on the list.
Be specific and be honest. This is your life and - if you are really going to make the changes necessary - you need to be honest with yourself. If you can't be honest with yourself, then you certainly won't be able to be honest with others about what you need to change.
Determine the action to be taken as a part of this process. In order for any change you make to become permanent, you must take certain steps. It is so easy to revert to the old way of doing things because the old way is comfortable. Real change requires you to stay with it and push through any emotion you have tied to the old way.
Whenever you make meaningful change, some form of emotion always accompanies it. There are any number of emotions, including fear, that may come into play as you start making these changes. Don't let emotions keep you from making lasting change.
Most of the things you fear about change are simply in your mind and not real. How many times have you been unhappy about making a change and then, after the process was over, you looked back and decided it wasn't nearly as bad as you thought?
Don't resist change because of fear. If a change is occurring and you aren't sure how you are going to react to it, give it a chance to work for you. The best thing you can do is embrace the change and give it a chance.
Here are seven steps you should take to make a change into a habit and not just a short-term attempt at change.
1. Create a sense of urgency about the change; Change is imperative and failure is not an option.
2. WRITE down specifically what you are trying to change and develop a SMART goal to accomplish it. n 3. WRITE out your vision of what you are trying to accomplish by making the change and what it will look like when the change is accomplished - be specific.
4. Identify any obstacle that could get in your way.
5. WRITE out a plan to overcome each of the obstacles you have identified.
6. Check to insure the change you are contemplating will get you closer to your goal. If it does, go after it with a passion. If it doesn't, go back and adjust what you need to change to get back in alignment.
7. Share it with your mentor or coach.
Remember that writing all of this down is necessary and will help you commit to the change. Just telling yourself you will do it is not enough. Make the commitment to write it down, share it with your mentor or coach and ask them to hold you accountable to doing it. Once you have made this level of commitment to change, then you are almost assured of making it happen and making the change stick.
To Your Success,
Dennis
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