Exercises for Finding Your Purpose

For many, discovering one's "purpose" or inner calling can be tough. I work with many, many clients who have this issue. In addition to one-on-one sessions with them, there are certain exercises that I recommend. Below is one such exercise that I think you will find helpful. It's a 4-part exercise, so utilize it when you have some time alone to focus on yourself. All you'll need is a pen/pencil, paper and your imagination.

1. Make a list of the things that you love about yourself. At first, you may struggle with this task. But, really try to focus on areas that make you proud. Perhaps you are a giving spirit who always thinks of others before yourself. Perhaps, you have helped thousands of students realize their own inner callings and you really love yourself for it. Perhaps you have a light and pleasant personality that brings life to all who know you. Perhaps you have the ability to make anything grow - plants, flowers, you name it!

Really tap into these areas. Then, focus on thanking yourself for being the unique and lovable person that you are. Spend time remembering when you've acted in ways that are consistent with the aspects that you love about yourself. Bask in the feeling that you get.

2. Write down aspects of life that really make you happy. They can be areas that are related to what you already do for a living. Or, they can be completely new areas that make you happy whenever you think of them. For instance, maybe talking to others about purpose makes you happy. Or, maybe you get a thrill from helping people plan their day or events. Maybe you're happiest when you're traveling to different cities or countries. Perhaps, you have always felt amazing whenever you're surrounded by flowers. Whatever these contentment aspects are, write them down. As you start building this list, it almost becomes infectious. You'll notice that more and more ideas come to you, because your spirit thrives on your happiness. So, focusing on ideas that make you smile will attract more ideas that make you smile.

3. Make a list of your natural talents. We all have them. It sounds like you may have a knack for teaching. Perhaps you also have a talent for being well organized, or a good communicator, or a motivator.

4. Interestingly, what I've noticed with my clients is that when you look at all three lists,there seems to be a connection between what you love about yourself, what naturally makes you happy and what your talents are. Looking at these lists is a great first step in determining how you can feel more complete.

So how do you combine these lists? Here is an example:

Let's suppose that on list number 1, you've have indicated that you really love talking to people. Then, let's say that on list number 2, you've indicated that you really love how you feel when you are teaching others. Perhaps on list number 3, you noted that you have a natural talent for positively affecting others whenever you're around them. Finding a way to combine these three areas would tap into your purpose.

Here is an example of a client I had a few years back. Being around children really made her happy. What she loved most about herself was her ability to positively impacting others. At the time, she worked at a bank and felt very unfulfilled. During our time together, she realized that she wanted to work with children in Sudan. But, she was scared to take this first step. She feared that she couldn't possibly leave what was familiar to go after something that would be such a huge change in lifestyle. Over the years, we've kept in touch and I was surprised to learn that she created a program within her church that helps children in Sudan and even moves some of them to the US. She travels to Sudan several times per year and is living her dream. She told me that she feels completely fulfilled and that her life now has meaning.

Her life always had meaning. But, she felt something was missing. When we have that feeling, I believe it is an inner message that there is more that you can be doing to live your purpose. I don't believe that our "purpose" is supposed to be hidden from us. I think the clues of that purpose can be found in knowing what really makes us happy and what talents we naturally possess.