Article

How To Keep Doubt From Destroying Your Dreams

Topic: HappinessFeaturing Bonnie McFarlandPublished June 5, 2008

Legacy signals

Legacy popularity: 2,174 legacy views

Reader rating

Not enough ratings yet

Aggregate average appears after enough eligible reader ratings.

Rate this resource

Sign in to rate this resource.

Sign in to rate this resource

"I can't make any money doing this."
"This is too good to be true."
"Maybe I just don't have what it takes to do this."
"I'm never going to figure this out."
"I guess I'm not going to find something I'm passionate about."
"I'm not sure any more that I really want to do this."

I've heard these doubts and many others from my clients as they follow their dreams, desires, and passions. Doubt seems to be a normal part of the busy human mind, one of Monkey Mind's favorite flavors.

Do you have thoughts that lead you to mistrust yourself, your vision, or your path?

Doubt can squeeze its tendrils around your mind, feed on itself, and, just like a wild vine, take over.

Doubt makes you uncertain, unsure, and confused. The doubting mind can't even be certain of its doubts. Thoughts whirl around in your head, often the same ones over and over. It's easy to become shaky and fearful, to begin to question and distrust everything, to get stalled, and to delay taking action.

Doubting, doubting, doubting also saps your energy. Eventually you may stop moving forward or give up completely. There goes your dream!

It doesn't have to be this way. You don't have to let doubt run - or ruin!- your life. Try doubting your doubt.nnn******************************
TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE?
******************************
One of my clients had been searching for her passion for a long, long time without success. She came to me to see if I could help her discover her passion. In our first few hours together, we identified a number of things that lit her up and that she was passionate about. Good news!

Within two weeks of that initial clarity, she came across an opportunity that would allow her to work from home, travel a little, and do something that she thought was so much fun she couldn't possibly get paid for doing it.

All of this lit her up so much she was on fire when she told me about it. In the midst of her excitement, though, she kept saying, "This is just too good to be true." That thought (which she had been having repetitively) was getting in the way of fully savoring and pursuing this opportunity.

Was it too good to be true? Maybe, maybe not. She didn't have enough information to know. Asking "Is this too good to be true?" over and over kept her busy whirling around in circles and it wasn't producing any useful answers.

So how could she get some useful answers? First, she needed to identify some intelligent questions.

I asked her what "due diligence" would help her discern if this was a viable opportunity. She quickly came up with "ask the organization for names of people who have made money doing this" and "check the Better Business Bureau." Just identifying these questions halted her whirling mind and gave her more clarity and focus. She got off the phone energized to get these and other intelligent questions answered.

As she does this, her increased knowledge will decrease her qualms and ease her fears of the unknown. She can then choose to move forward with this opportunity or to find another path.nnn******************************
IN YOUR LIFEn******************************
When your mind is filled with doubts, going back and forth in your head is more likely to increase your uncertainty and confusion than to help you. To reduce your doubt and fear of the unknown, here's a way to begin doubting your doubt. nn* What are you doubting? What are you saying to yourself that is creating your uncertainty? Write this down.nn* Identify five to ten intelligent questions related to whatever it is that you have qualms about. Write them down.nn* Get answers to those questions. nn* Allow the information you gather to decrease your misgivings and fear and to guide your next choices and actions.

By the way, if you can't come up with intelligent questions that is a big clue it's just your Monkey Mind talking. In which case, thank it for sharing and turn your attention to your dream, your desire, your vision, your next step.

Doubt your doubts, not your dreams. As Franklin Delano Roosevelt said, "The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today."

Article author

About the Author

Bonnie McFarland works with women at midlife who are bored, stuck, or restless and wondering what to do with the rest of their lives. Bonnie’s e-book, "What Lights You Up? Your Guide to Pleasure, Passion, and Purpose in Life,” as well as “Light Matters," her ezine with tips and tools for getting more of what you truly want, are both available free at www.labellavia.com.

Further reading

Further Reading

4 total

Article

The Unexpected Value in the Medicine Cabinet In households across the country, life with diabetes often involves a constant influx of supplies. From monitors to lancets, the logistics of managing blood sugar are intense. Often, due to changes in insurance coverage, a shift in a doctor’s recommended brand, or a transition to a Continuous Glucose Monitor (CGM), many people find themselves with a surplus of boxes sitting in a drawer. For a long time, these boxes were simply di

February 20, 2026

Article

If you've ever pulled a black shirt out of the closet only to find it coated in a fine layer of cat fur, you already know the struggle. Shedding is one of those things nobody really warns you about before you bring a cat home. Sure, you expect a little fur here and there. But entire tumbleweeds rolling across your hardwood floor? That catches people off guard. Here's the thing — shedding is completely normal. Cats lose old or damaged hair as part of their natural growth cyc

February 16, 2026

Article

In the fast-paced lifestyle of Highett, where balancing work, school, and family time can be challenging, maintaining a lush and beautiful garden often falls to the bottom of the to-do list. However, having a green and inviting outdoor space doesn’t have to mean hours of upkeep. With smart design choices and the right plants, you can create a stunning, low-maintenance garden that fits seamlessly into your busy family life. Choose Native and Drought-Tolerant Plants For Highe

October 29, 2025

Article

As 2026 begins, many of us feel the familiar push to "start fresh." But lasting wellness isn't about ove ight changes or short-lived resolutions—it's about small, meaningful actions that improve both your physical and mental health. Whether you're ready to overhaul your routine or simply add better habits to your day, here are five smart, sustainable moves to make this year your healthiest yet. - Make Your Dental Health a Priority Your smile says a lot about your health—and

October 28, 2025