It is not about the destination or the journey.nnBefore I go any further, I will admit that I am among the thousands who have been helped by the saying “it is not about the destination, it is about the journey.” The more I personally focused on and enjoyed the journey, the more I enjoyed life as a series of learning moments, a forum for character development, and a playground for exploration. nnBut somewhere along the way, I began to wonder about the life-as-a-journey model. More specifically, if a journey-focused life was more fulfilling than a destination-focused life, could there be another sort of life that was even more fulfilling than a journey-focused life?nnThe answer is yes. There is another sort of life that is even more fulfilling than a journey-focused life.nnAs I said, it is not about the destination or the journey.nnWhat is it about then? Read on to find out.nnWhat Is So Bad about the Journey?nnThose of us who have gone from life-as-a-destination to life-as-a-journey know how much better everything becomes. nnWith the destination we experienced fleeting satisfaction upon reaching our goal, only to moments later feel the need to chase the next peak; with the journey we can enjoy every step we take, regardless of where it is along the way.nnWith the destination we vainly pursued our ultimate goal while it ever receded from us like the horizon; with the journey we walk, rest, gaze back to see how far we have come, smile, and walk some more.nnSo what is so bad about the journey then? nnIt is not a matter of good or bad, but of better and best. And though life-as-a-journey is better than life-as-a-destination, there is another life model that is best of all.nnThe Resemblance between Journey and DestinationnnIn fact, the more you examine the life-as-a-journey model, the more you will notice its resemblance to life-as-a-destination.nnFor example, have you ever felt the exhilaration of the latest leg of the journey—the insight in a new book, the high of a convention experience, the discovery of a new friend—only to later find yourself looking forward to the next insight, high, or discovery? (Sounds an awful lot like feeling the need to chase the next peak.)nnOr have you ever made a real breakthrough into new territory of the journey—abundance instead of scarcity, respecting yourself, speaking your mind—only to remember all your other messed up parts that still needed to be worked on? (Sounds like having an ultimate goal recede from you like the horizon.)nnHere is one way to explain such similarities between life-as-a-journey and life-as-a-destination: If the above is your experience, you are still destination focused and are simply fooling yourself into thinking that you are journey focused. After all, chasing, need, and dissatisfaction are not supposed to be part of a journey. nnThe Journey as DestinationnnHere is another way to explain such similarities between life-as-a-journey and life-as-a-destination: Being genuinely journey focused can still mean experiencing chasing, need, and dissatisfaction. True, these negative effects might be less intense than in a destination-focused life, but they are still the same.nnSo why does life-as-a-journey not eliminate these negative effects? Because journey is a destination.nnThink about it. You are currently at Point A. Your destination is Point B. The time and distance between Point A and Point B is the journey. If you are always focused on getting to Point B, you are destination focused. And we all agree that does not make for the most enjoyable life.nnOn the other hand, if you are focused on the time and distance between Point A and Point B, you are journey focused. Again, we all agree this makes for a far better life than being destination focused.nnBut did you notice what neither of the above scenarios is focused on?nnThe Despised Point AnnThat is right. Point A.nnThe life-as-a-destination model obviously does not focus on Point A because it is focused on Point B. nnThe life-as-a-journey model can appear to be focused on Point A because it promotes experiencing the here and now; it promotes being in the moment.nnBut if you recall, the journey is not really about Point A, but the time and distance between Point A and Point B. After all, the essence of a journey is to be going from one place to another—to be moving from where you are to where you will be next.nnWhich begs the question, “What is wrong with Point A?”nn“Only an Idiot Is Happy with What He Is”nnThe only thing wrong with Point A is that we usually do not like it. nnFor the destination-focused person, Point B is infinitely better than Point A: better looking, better feeling, better living.nnFor the journey-focused person, moving forward is infinitely better than remaining at Point A: better understanding, better awareness, better evolved.nnBesides, is accepting Point A really an option? Are we not naturally inclined to learn and grow and evolve? As an acquaintance of mine wrote in an e-mail, “Only an idiot is happy with what he is.”nnThe Wisdom of an IdiotnnPutting political correctness aside for a moment, maybe we can learn from the idiot. nnImagine for a moment what it would be like to be happy with what you are. Not a single criticism. Not a single longing for reform. Not even a single ambition—just Point A.nnIf that does not appeal to you, you are probably focused on Point B, or at least journeying beyond Point A. How could such a life model be responsible? Are we not supposed to better ourselves? Are we not supposed to make a difference in the world?nnAbsolutely—if you are destination or journey focused. It comes with the territory. Yet try as you might, it never gets done. Either Point B continually recedes like the horizon, or the journey never ends—in other words, chasing, need, and dissatisfaction.nnThe 30-Day Point A ChallengennAccepting Point A, or simply “being,” must lead to stagnation, apathy, and a wasted life. At least that is what I used to think. nnWhat about all the negative things in myself that demanded reform? If I simply accepted myself, would not those negative things go unchecked, possibly ruining me?nnAnd what about all the negative things in the world? If I simply accepted things as they were, if I did not try to move beyond Point A, surely things would only get worse. How could it be any other way?nnAmazingly, it can be another way. But you will never know it until you take the 30-Day Point A Challenge:nn1. forget Point Bn2. forget the journeyn3. just accept Point A. nnFor 30 days, forget learning, growing, and evolving. Forget being “responsible” and making a difference. Forget reform, ambition, and even goals. For 30 days, just be. Do not even wonder what the result will be (there is no way you could possibly know, even if you are sure you do).nnAnd if after 30 days you do not prefer how you see yourself and your world, feel free to return to your previous course. nnMy Hope for YounnI hope you find what I found: that nothing is wrong with Point A, that nothing is wrong with you, that there is nowhere to go, and that that is a good thing. Be well.nnn** This article is one of 101 great articles that were published in 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life. To get complete details on “101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life”, visit
http://www.selfgrowth.com/greatways3.html n