Are You Killing Your Beautiful Dream?

It's one of the saddest events I see and unfortunately, Insee it far too often. Fear, the most destructive of humannemotions, succeeds in totally ruining the dreams andnambitions of millions and millions of people EVERY YEAR.

And the real sad part is that the people involved give in to their fears and kill their beautiful dream. Any chance of experiencing a fulfilled happy life, of living the life they truly want, evaporates.

Just why do people kill their dreams?

I want to share with you a true story to illustrate what'snhappening here.

Recently, I met up with a good friend of mine for a drink. I hadn't seen her for a while and was looking forward tonmeeting up. Nikkie is a very talented dancer who's nevernhappier than when she's dancing. When I last saw her, shenwas buzzing with excitement about 2 stage shows she wasnperforming in and told me of her plans to finish her ITndegree course then move to London to pursue her dancingnprofessionally. Eventually, she'd manage her own studio andnteach.

What a great dream, yes? Dancing and performing for anliving, then teaching the art to others. Beats the 9-5 ratnrace, doesn't it?

Her eyes sparkled and she had a real buzz about her. Havenyou ever felt this way about something? Passion! A constant, unwavering, motivating, inspiring PASSION. Believe me, it is something I love to find in people. People who feel this way about their dream crackle with energy and are busy living life.

I couldn't wait to hear how her plans were progressing andnhow her shows had gone. Yes, she is attractive, but whatnattracted me the most was her passion for her dream. Passion is contagious!

OK, get the tissues ready because here's the sad news:

We met and I knew instantly something had changed. She toldnme about how hard her exams had been but she'd obtained herndegree. "Well done, now, what's happening with your dancing? How did the shows go?"

She replied that the shows were fine and then knocked me for 6: "I've decided not to pursue dancing now. I've started a graduate management training scheme and I'm going to have a career in IT instead."

I tried and tried to talk her into pursuing her dream butnthe buzz had gone. She'd always said the degree was just for back up in case things didn't work out with her dancing. I reminded her of this and she said, resignedly: "things have changed. Dancing will just be for fun now."

At the root of her decision is fear. The usual fear excusesnwere all trotted out:

"It's so difficult to break in to the top level."

"I'd have to move away from home and I'd miss my family toonmuch. Besides, I'd be on my own in a big city."

"There's much more money in IT."

I told her others had overcome the first two therefore, shencould. But the last one is the real key. I had a fantasticncareer in IT - I still love working with computers, alwaysnhave. Conversely, Nikkie had worked for 6 weeks last summe
in an office and HATED EVERY SECOND of it. She was bored,ndidn't like being indoors and it wasn't active enough fornher. And now, with a degree firmly in her hand, she'snwilling to sell-out on her dream to do something she hatesnpurely for money and security. She isn't the first to killnher dream for these reasons and she sure won't be the last.

I feel sorry for her. Because now she'll never know how farnshe could've got as a dancer. Maybe one day she'll return to it and teach and I really hope she does. But it won't be as the wonderfully fulfilled person who gave everything for her dream and experienced true fulfilment, tremendousnsatisfaction and the greatest reward of all: the happinessnthat comes from achieving success having overcome challengenafter challenge.

Yes, going for a dream is real tough. There will be endlessnhours of work and effort. Years of dedication, tears ofnfrustration, setbacks, knocks, sticking points and failures. That's the price demanded by success. But my lord is it worth every single second of it when finally, the day dawns when your efforts start to bear fruit. It's a very special feeling, the biggest buzz you or I can ever have.

Your dream is special. You don't need anyone's approval fornit, you don't need to make excuses for it and you don't need to be frightened of it. Embrace it. Commit to it. I promise you, you will not regret it no matter what happens. But if you give-up on it, if you kill it, well...

I'll leave you with the same words I said to Nikkie as wensaid our goodbyes:

"As the years pass, age will bring you time to reflect onnyour life. If you live a dream your memories will bring younjoy and comfort. If you betray it, the memory of yournbetrayal will haunt you because you'll never know how highnyou could've flown. Life is not a dress rehearsal. Pleasendon't give up on your dream."

Beautiful dreams die everyday. Nikkie killed hers. Pleasendon't kill yours too.

Until next time.