Avoiding Negative People on the Road to Success

Success can be, and probably is, something different to each one of us. But the road traveled to reach that success, whatever it is to you, will most likely be a long journey. This journey will have sharp curves,steep hills, narrow shoulders, deep ruts, many detours, and possibly even some dead ends. Some of these hazards will be people; unfortunately, they’ll often be co-workers, family members, and friends. Your determination for success will get you where you want to go, but how do you avoid the negative people who will make the trip a difficult journey?

The hardest part of avoiding negative people is first being able to identify who they are. Often they don't express how they feel, but frequently put up road blocks on purpose. Your task is to identify why they are being negative. Some people are negative because they are jealous. You’ve determined what you want out of life and you’re on the road to achieve it. You’re moving forward and leaving them behind. Whether they are fellow employees, family members, or friends, their jealousy makes them want you to stay put – they don’t want you to leave them!

They will find ways to hold you back. Some will appear as if they’re comforting you when you’re having a rough day or days. When you’re really struggling, their (what seems to be) empathy or sympathy might really be their way of encouraging to “stop all this” and be who you used to be when you were happy with the mediocre. Encouraging you to take time off of your goal, to not expect so much of yourself, or to “try again” some other time are approaches that will hold you back. All of these are ploys to keep you where you are. Often this is because they fear they are losing you and being left behind. They see the distance you're road to success is creating and they don't want to come along, probably because they're too comfortable where they are.

Others might not want you to succeed because they want to get there first. The more they hold you back, the more opportunity for them to achieve their success first. It's a contest for them, and they are determined to win. They want to be the one who follows rather than being the one who leads.

How do you avoid them? You don’t have to tell them to leave you alone. But you can spend more time with others - those who truly want you to succeed. By spending more time with those who encourage you, you’ll have less time for the negativity carriers. As you grow, and become more successful, this will become an automatic transition for you; it will also be an automatic transition for those who enjoy negativity. They will seek each other out because that’s where they have a comfort level.

There is one other person you’ll probably run into from time to time who is negative. That person is you. Watch for this, and immediately address it. Look back and see how far you’ve come, revisit your plan, and remember the ultimate outcome you are driving towards.

Avoid the negativity, and your road to success will have fewer bumps, twists and turns. And before you know it, you’ll have reached your destination. Just in time to plan your next adventure!