Balloons boost, bolster, and brighten women's biggest birthdays.

Make the biggest of big birthdays balloon bonanzas.

Of course, we acknowledge that every birthday is special-just like we imagine every day ought to be mother's day. Still, we have to acknowledge that some birthdays are just naturally bigger and more important than others. Some birthdays confer more privileges and responsibilities, others commemorate the passage of decades, and all major birthdays inspire bigger and more extravagant celebrations. The more important the occasion and the bigger the bash, the bigger and bolder the balloons should be.
Sixteen is sweeter with birthday balloons.

Sixteen is synonymous with driving. Sure, cake and ice cream are nice, and a smooch from the boyfriend or girlfriend counts for quite a bit. But really it's all about the car-getting a license, earning family car privileges, or maybe even getting a car as a gift. Nothing says "Happy Sweet Sixteen" like a car key suspended from the string of a helium balloon and dangling there, tantalizing and wonderful, in mid-air. Better still if the balloon appears as if by magic or is delivered by a stranger. Of course, you can fill a car with balloons, or you can cover a car with balloons, or you actually can make a car from balloons. Balloons go as naturally with cars as gas and oil do; you just have to turn the ignition on your imagination.

Balloons make twenty-five okay and thirty not so old.

Only women truly understand the significance of their twenty-fifth birthdays; their significance seems encoded in the second x-chromosome, and the bio-psycho-social chemistry goes into overdrive as soon as the clock strikes midnight and the fateful commemoration begins. No matter what her personal and professional circumstances, every girl goes into home-and-family mode-gotta get one, gotta improve one, gotta make one perfect. There's nothing celebratory about twenty-five; it's a major milestone, benchmark, and barometer of a woman's accomplishments. Therefore, add extra balloons in extra colours as needed.

By the time thirty rolls around, nesting urge has run its course, and the chromosomes demand an accounting. "What have you done with your life, woman?" they urgently need to know. Although older women understand that thirty marks the threshold of maturity and self-assurance, the woman turning thirty regards the three-oh! as a day of reckoning. Goals delayed or deferred regain their old urgency, and a girl's scalp requires careful attention for gray hairs; crows' feet undergo close scrutiny, and smile lines become more alarming. Therefore, add extra-extra balloons as urgency and piquancy demand.

Balloons blast forty festivities.

Physicians and statisticians report that women currently in their twenties confidently may expect to live past their one-hundredth birthdays. Fact; not speculation. Given that fact, then we must begin regarding forty as the new twenty-one, celebrating with rites of passage to serious grown-upness. We can wear high heels without tottering; add balloons. We skillfully can apply mascara to our lower lashes; add balloons. We finally know which colours and styles flatter us most; add balloons. We know how many cocktails we can manage without becoming pathetic; add balloons. We seriously and unashamedly crave chocolate cake. Add a lot of balloons.