Can You See Yourself Achieving...?

How we see ourselves and how we identify ourselves has a huge impact on the behaviors we adapt and the success that we are capable of achieving.

When you introduce yourself to someone what are some of the things that you use to describe your identity?

“I am a mom of two great kids”

“I am a Life Coach”

“I am connected here or doing this…”

In the most literal way, these are things that reflect how we see ourselves. When someone says that they cannot see themselves doing something… “I just can’t see myself talking to strangers about my new Coaching business.” “I just can’t see myself being successful.” This fundamentally reflects the images we are creating in our mind of what we are capable of achieving. Our mind, or our unconscious/subconscious mind, is the part of us that is guiding and leading us toward what it perceives to be best for the body, mind, and spirit. If it feels like your mind has been working against you it is because the only images/representations that you have available are images of not having what you want.. or otherwise reflect an identity that involves failure, lack, insecurity, or doubt.

So, if on a deep and fundamental level of your being you want to be easy to talk to about Life Coaching or your business and you want to be elegant about integrating entrepreneurship into your current life so that people are naturally attracted to you then you must begin by creating internal images and feelings that match that outcome.

“Positive thinking” has begun to get a bad-rap as being for hopeless optimists, cheesy do-gooders and masked unhappiness. However, there is an actual process happening in our mind when we are thinking thoughts that bring us toward our goal or away from it.

There are two distinct ways that we process information one leads us to procrastination and the other leads us to motivation and action.

When you ask people who exercise regularly “why” they do it, they will often reply “It feels good when I am done.” Hence they are literally creating images deep inside their unconscious mind of completing the exercise and feeling really good about that representation and then saying something really motivating to themselves like “Let’s get started”.

The model for procrastination involves a slightly different process. If you were to talk to someone about why they don’t exercise regularly you may hear something like, “It’s too much hassle: first, I have to get up, then find my exercise gear, then I have to put it on.. and by the time I am done with that—I couldn’t be bothered going at all.” This process involves creating images of all the little steps that have to go into doing something, feeling bad about those things, and then saying something to oneself that sounds like, “I will just do it tomorrow.”

This happens to me with vacuuming. I love the feeling of a clean house but I absolutely do NOT like to vacuum. First, I have to wrestle it out of the closet, then the cord gets tangled or in my way and just when I am about to get the last corner of the room the cord runs out of slack and I have to turn it off, go unplug it, plug it in again somewhere closer (hopefully there is a plug closer), then I bang the furniture trying to get under things… needless to say I don’t feel good about it and postpone it until later.

Truth is, to me, there is nothing better than a freshly vacuumed house. It has a clean feeling that is undeniable. So, If I am going to get the vacuuming done: first I have to think about the house being totally vacuumed, then I have to feel the good feelings of that fresh clean house and the personal satisfaction that will come from that, and then I’ve got to say something to myself that sounds like, “Yes, I will vacuum right now.”

If you are wanting to get results out of an area of your life, like a Life Coaching business or new entrepreneurial business. Then a few essential steps must happen first.

1. Imagine yourself the way you see yourself now. What is your identity? Who are you? What are you good at? What types of things do you do?

(If you have a hard time imagining or with visualization you can just pretend that you can see yourself.)

2. Think about your goal or desired outcome. What do you want to accomplish? What things do you want to do with your time and energy? What type of person do you want to be?

Example: I want to be someone who gets things done easily and effectively

3. Reflect on whether or not these identities are aligned? How far is the gap between them? Do you feel you have a long way to go or are you almost there?

Example: I am mostly this way… I just get blocked on a few things.

4. Choose a goal or desire that you have for yourself.

Example: Vacuum the house regularly.
5. Think about how you will know when you have it? What will tell you that you have achieved your goal or desire? What is the very last step, the final product, the moment of achievement that will give you a sense of knowing that it is done?

Example: I will know the vacuuming is done when the house feels fresh and clean. I will relax on the couch and feel the feelings of completion.

6. Focus on this image/representation.

7. Allow yourself to feel really strong good feelings about having and/or accomplishing this. Feel those feelings now.

(If you don’t feel good about having your outcome it may be an indicator that you either must do more to align your identity and with your goals or adjust your goal to be something that you really want—versus what others want for you or what you feel you “should” be doing.)

8. As you are feeling these good feelings now say to yourself something very motivating like, “Yeah, let’s get started!”, “I am good enough and I can do this now”

Keep in mind that the image you have of yourself is one of the most important factors that contributes to your success. You must see yourself in a good light, see yourself as the way you want to be, feel good about yourself being that way, and continue to support yourself in your positive self image by saying good things to yourself like, “ I can do this” or “I am capable of more tha
I ever thought imaginable”, “I am easy to talk to”, “I can be successful”.