Confidence is beautiful!

A woman that is confident radiates strength, passion and conviction.
A confident woman is not afraid to be herself.
She knows who she is. Her values, her passions, her skills, her talents and her unique gifts.
She knows that she is beautiful just the way she is, regardless of what the media dictates.

What is your definition of beauty? Is it the typical definition? The one that society and the media has us believing?

When I began modeling at the age of 15, I defined beauty based on what others thought about me, and how many modeling jobs I would book. If I was consistently working as a model, that meant that people approved of me and that therefore I must be a beautiful person. This type of thinking is very dangerous and destructive because instead of understanding, appreciating and embracing myself and my own definition of beauty, I was placing my level of confidence and self-esteem in the hands of other people and what they thought of me.

Another way that I determined beauty was by association. I was working with very beautiful women who were recognizable and being paid a lot of money. Since they were my friends and I was spending my time in their company, I believed that I was beautiful.
I also measured my level of beauty by the men in my life. If I was attracting and dating good-looking, muscular, “hot guys” that were successful, I thought I was beautiful.

Another way was by my level of success. The more successful I became as a model, the more fashion shows I booked, the more ads I had, the more buses and billboards I was featured on, the more people recognized me. I was invited to the best parties and was VIP everywhere I wanted to go. So therefore, I must be beautiful. I had all those beautiful, successful friends and got to go to all those fabulous places that everyone wanted to go to.

The reality is that although I loved fashion and seeing the newest and latest trends in the industry, I really was not passionate about being a model. A lot of girls in the modeling industry were not the kind of people that I wanted to be associated with. My Mom always told me..."Show me who your friends are, and I'll show you who you are." Those are words I will NEVER forget. Most of the models were conceited, egotistical, self-centered and had a very unhealthy body image. The majority of them had eating disorders and/or abused drugs. I was not fulfilled being a model and most of the people I did not want to build relationships with outside of work.

My life at that time was focused on my physical appearance... my height, my weight and my hair, my skin, my clothing and if I was beautiful enough to book the next job. Nobody cared if I had a brain and having an opinion was certainly not appreciated. I remember the very last auditio
I went out on. I was almost 6’ tall, I was 128lbs, and I was told that I needed to lose weight and lose my muscle mass. I was super athletic, loved to run and be active, yet it wasn’t enough. I was too flat-chested, too muscular, and not scrawny enough to become really successful in the world of modeling.

I learned at a young age that how you feel about yourself, and how you carry yourself is ultimately more important than how you look. Looks are important, as they play a role in sexual attraction, but looks are not everything! Many people find other qualities more important than looks. Other qualities like confidence and self-esteem. It’s really important to note that exte
al beauty has an expiration date. When we are 65 years old, we will all look the same! The most beautiful people I know are the people that are beautiful from within. They love themselves and the world around them. Authentic confidence comes from within us, not from outside influences.

Do you carry yourself with confidence? How well you carry yourself and how confident you appear to others you are interested in will more likely determine how attractive you are and how sexy you will be perceived to be than most all other aspects of your appearance. Confidence is about being emotionally stable and centered in yourself and not being dependent on validation from others. Becoming confident can seem difficult if you aren't already confident. But confidence is a skill and just like any other skill, the more you practice it, the easier it becomes.
If you could use some help discovering your own inner beauty (the most important kind!) give me a call or send me an email!