Conquering Fear: Recapturing Sanity Amidst Chaos

Reading Time: 6-7 mins
Over the last several years, my whole life actually, fear has been my obstacle to success. It never occurred to me that most fear is irrational until I further researched and examined it.
Ninety percent of the things we fear will never happen.
Why do people put so much effort into worrying about something that will, more than likely, never occur? Fear is natural. It was built into the biochemical and emotional response systems in order to support survival during dangerous situations. For instance, the increased heart racing and sweat dripping from the forehead when one sees a bear is a survival based fear. Other fear indicators like the palm sweats and dry mouth one experiences before speaking is normal, but not a survival based fear.
Let's classify two types of fear: survival based and experience based fear. Survival based fears are the two fears all people are born with; the fear of falling and the fear of a loud noise. If people are born with only these fears, why is fear such a major part of life? Our experiences as children, youth and teenagers develop fears. Some of these fears develop because an experience happened directly and sometimes indirectly.
The reasons behind a particular fear should be discussed with a professional. In this article, let's discuss how to conquer fear when it's irrational.
When fear occurs, it could happen suddenly, or it can come on in phases. For example, the fear of public speaking happens gradually, starting with the fear of what to say, then it continues to spiral downward into heart palpitations and sweating. Whereas, being approached by someone unknown could instantly set off physical and emotional fear responses.
So what? Do we allow experience based fear to control us? I've had many times that I've allowed experience based fear control the outcome of my day. This is not just in mood, but fear debilitates my ability to perform certain functions in every day life. So the following techniques are ones I've learned to calm down, see the big picture and overcome.

1. Identify what the fear is.
When suffering from nausea, hot flashes, and dizziness, it can be difficult identifying the exact fear. It could be a combination of fears. Take the time to observe yourself, like you were an outsider looking in. Notice when the symptoms become worse and when they lessen. These are indicators of what your true fear is. You may not be able to identify the base fear immediately, but identifying any fear and then working through the following steps will support you in learning more about yourself and your fears.

2. Take Deep Breaths
This is one of the most important things to do when under any type of stress.
"Breathing incorrectly can produce tension, exhaustion and vocal strain, interfere with athletic activity and encourage aches and illnesses," says Nancy Zi, a Glendale, breathing expert and author of , "The Art of Breathing." Breathe correctly, however, and you can "melt away tension and stress, improve energy or simply relax and unwind."
For correct technique you may want to visit www.authentic-breathing.com. For a quick and easy technique that I've learned is to first exhale, put your hand on your belly and breathe in. At this point your belly should expand as the air goes in. This breath should be slow and deliberate. Once you have inhaled, place your finger in front of your mouth and breathe out like you are blowing out candles. This particular technique is taught to preschoolers and supports a clam and relaxing environment for both children and adults. For more information on techniques for preschoolers visit the nonprofit, Relationship Roots at www.relationshiproots.org.

3. Take small steps through the fear.
Break the fear down into parts and examine the parts. If I am afraid to talk with people about my business, I could break it down into several parts. First part could be approaching people, the second part could be what to talk about, and the third could be how to come away with a lead.
After breaking down the fear into parts, work on the individual parts. Ideas on how to work on individual parts are:

• Role-play with a supportive co-worker, friend or partner
• Interview people who have overcome the same fear
• Really look at what the worst that could happen
• Research and learn more, which will build confidence
• Go to a counselor

When fear becomes overwhelming, chaos seems to follow, but by conquering even a less restricting fear, sanity behind the fear comes back.
Fear can be a real and debilitating problem. If you believe your fear is overwhelming your life, please consider talking with your doctor about the possibility of having an anxiety disorder.