Coping with Grief

There have been several high-profile deaths just this week that have dominated the television news coverage and received a seemingly endless amount of written coverage on the internet and entertainment publications. First, we learned of the passing of Ed McMahon, who is undoubtedly the most famous sidekick in history. He provided an essential accompaniment to Johnny Carson for more than thirty years, and his impact on our popular culture is undeniable. Then, we received the shocking news of the deaths of both Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson in the same day. Particularly in the case of Michael Jackson, whose passing was so unexpected, we quickly witnessed an outpouring of emotion and grief from around the globe. These losses to our greater society made me reflect on how we deal with grief when the person we lose is someone with whom we have a much more personal relationship. Yes, we may make a passing comment about Michael Jackson such as, “It’s so sad. He was an amazing talent” or “I feel as if a part of my childhood has passed with him.” However, when we are grieving the loss of a parent, spouse, or child, the pain is usually more intense and longer lasting.

There are plenty of recommendations given by well-trained professionals concerning how to deal with the grieving process. You need to surround yourself with caring people, such as family and friends who understand the specific relationship you are mourning or perhaps a support group of people who are sharing a similar experience. You must continue to pay attention to your physical health. Make sure that you are eating well, getting plenty of sleep (but not too much), and exercising on a regular basis. If your physical self is in shape, your mind and spirit can heal faster as well. Always remember to be patient with your feelings. Do not rush yourself to get over the loss of a loved one in weeks or even months. Be present with each emotion that grips you and try to work through it naturally. There is no time table for lessening the sense of sadness and grief.

Concerning this last point of embracing your emotions, know that you will need to spend some time with yourself to work through grief. People in pain are often tempted to stay as busy as possible to avoid those quiet moments of self-reflection. However, please know that those times when we allow ourselves to focus inward can be incredibly healing if done so with purpose and an open spirit. One method through which this process can be accomplished is the relaxation techniques that come with hypnosis. When you embark on such a journey, your unconscious mind will be opened and you soon will be able to retrain your thought processes so that you are not bogged down by the heavy burden of depression and pain. You will reach a point at which a loved one’s death is able to become a celebration of an amazing life instead of a painful episode that must be internalized and left to dampen the quality of your own continuing existence. Make the choice to live your life to the fullest! You owe this to the loved one who still means so much to you.