Custody and Moving and the Relativity to Those Who Are Abandoned

Divorce is a difficult process as it is, but it is even more difficult when it extends beyond simple custody and moving and becomes a case of abandonment. As sad as it is, many non-custodial parents—or those who perceive themselves to be—make the choice to abandon their families rather than face a court order dictating child support and visitation. It' almost as if they feel the divorce also gives them the right to "divorce" their children as well. This doesn't happen just in cases where the spouse being left behind works but also in cases where there is a spouse that has always stayed home and taken care of the children. rnAbandonment is also not limited to cases where the spouse that remains behind is the one filing for divorce. In some cases the abandonment is the reason there is a need for custody and moving: the spouse remaining behind is unable to financially provide for the children without the aid of the other parent. Cases of abandonment may include any of the following: • Leaving the family home without notice or preparationrn• Leaving the family home and employment in order to avoid paying child support and/or alimonyrn• Leaving the family home while taking the proceeds of all bank accounts thus leaving the spouse destitutern• Leaving the family home with no possessions and simply not returning or notifying anyone of whereabouts or intentions—in this case no one knows if the person has come upon an accident and is hurt or simply doesn't want to be foundrnIf you are abandoned you still have rights although you may not be unable to exercise them immediately. The involuntary act of custody and moving on the part of your spouse does not relinquish his or her responsibility to the spouse and children—it only delays the process. You still have the right to file an order for custody and child support, which the court can execute when you locate your spouse. It may take time, but eventually you will probably be successful. There are some cases where the spouse never shows up and remains in hiding for years, but not always.rnAnother option you have that involves custody and moving is to charge your spouse with abandonment and file to have his or her parental rights removed. While this is a serious step to take, it offers the opportunity for you to move forward and begin the healing process. It is usually something most people avoid unless they remarry and the stepparent wants to adopt the children. In this scenario all that is necessary is for you to place an advertisement in the newspaper located in the town where you last had an address—or your local newspaper if you have heard nothing since your spouse left the home. If you are forced to collect public assistance you may not have this option since the state will file an order for child support and pursue him or her through various systems—only if there is no employment record can the spouse continue to "hide."