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Dealing with Resentment in a Relationship? Find out Why!

Topic: Relationship AdviceBy Beth Banning and Neill GibsonPublished Recently added

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Have you ever noticed the labels people have placed on you over the years? Have you been branded with comments like, “selfish” or “clean freak” In the resentment of the moment, have you also applied labels to people you know? The Label Me This- Brand You That contest is all about proving who’s right and who’s wrong. How would you like to opt out of this contest and become the real winner in all your relationships? If so, read on and discover some simple first steps! The Label Me This-Brand You That contest is one you have entered and didn’t even know it. You are a willing participant every time something happens and in the frustration of the moment you react by labeling the other person. How about when you are waiting for a parking space in a crowed lot and someone comes from the other side and slips right into the space. Do you instinctively shout anything like, “Hey that’s just rude.” or “What a jerk!” When you focus on negative labels about what people "are" (demanding, controlling, manipulative) you might score points in the Label Me This –Brand You That contest, but it's certain that no one will end up happy or satisfied with the interaction. The fine print clause of this contest states that by focusing on what people “are” keeps you from taking control because you’re giving way your personal power. No real winner here! Change the Name of the Contest To – Own Your Personal Power So how does focusing on what people “are”, take away from your personal power? Because by branding someone as selfish, over controlling or snobby, you place the full responsibility for improving the situation on them. If you believe that you’re unhappiness is a result of their actions, then you will never be happy until they change their ways. The only thing this does is keep you in that no-win contest. It leads to more resentment and moves you closer to relationship disaster. The Own Your Personal Power contest suggests you to take back responsibility for your own happiness. The first rule for this new game, asks you to reclaim control by releasing the idea that other people are causing your emotional pain. When you realize that it’s your negative branding of other people that is the cause of you’re feeling upset, you’ve grasped the meaning behind this new contest rule and ensure a win every time! By dismissing the negative labels, you focus on what you "do want" in each situation. You can then ask yourself what is needed to create an outcome that would satisfy everyone involved. When you know what you want, you realize the goal of the new contest is to seek out opportunities to meet everyone’s needs in all situations. This realization starts the process toward healthy relationships with others and yourself. Definitely a win-win for all. Enter the New Contest Today! Any time you hear yourself blaming someone or complaining about circumstances in your life, figure out what is needed to create an outcome that would satisfy everyone involved and then identify at least one action you can take or a request you can make that will improve your situation. The Label Me This-Brand You That contest will become a game from a bygone era. More importantly, you will avoid relationship resentment and have lasting satisfying interactions. A game where everyone is a winner!

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