Article

Do Online Affairs Count as Cheating?

Topic: Overcoming Adultery and InfidelityPublished March 25, 2011

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With the internet spreading and giving more and more people access to information, e-mail, and all the other wonders online, internet affairs are becoming more and more common. But what exactly is an internet affair and more importantly, does it count as cheating? Online affairs are easy since most people in developed countries can get access to the internet with ease. Having an affair online is also appealing to many because it is very discrete. You don’t even have to “hook up” with someone in your town and worry about running into them when you are out running errands. But most men actually get caught up in online affairs because many of them don’t view it as cheating. Surprisingly many men believe that having an affair online or otherwise interacting with a woman through the internet isn’t considered cheating. Their motto is: If it didn’t happen in real life, it doesn’t count. Is this true? Can questionable online activity be simply brushed off with a flippant remark like that? Of course not! If you wouldn’t do it in the real world, why would you think you could do it online? If you discover an online affair, the fallout from it is just as real as what you would expect from a physical affair. Even though the two people involved may never have touched, the consequences are still very real. Never doubt that online affairs are just as real as offline affairs. The bottom line is that if you feel like you need to flirt with other people online and that the fact that it’s “just online” somehow justifies it for you, then you have to admit that there are some problems in your marriage. If your spouse is missing something in the marriage and he has an itch to scratch, so to speak, the convenience and anonymity of the internet makes the perfect opportunity to scratch it. Nearly all affairs are the result of some problem in the marriage. It could be lack of communication, hidden resentment, feeling taken for granted, or anything else. But if there is an affair in your marriage, physical or real, then you would be safe to bet that there is probably some other problem that laid the stage for the affair to happen. After all, happy couples don’t cheat. The way to deal with the affair is to take a look at your relationship and try to understand what isn’t working. Have a talk with your spouse about it and see if he will share what needs he has that aren’t being met by your marriage. If you are committed to saving your marriage, the two of you will need to develop a realistic and sustainable plan to help both of you get your needs met effectively. This will probably take a good deal of work, but the benefits can outweigh the cost of divorce if you are devoted to saving the marriage. By satisfying both of your needs in the marriage, then neither one of you will be tempted to cheat again, online or offline.

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