DON'T JUST GO WITH THE FLOW, GO WITH YOUR FLOW

DON’T JUST GO WITH THErnFLOW, GO WITH YOUR FLOW Going with the flow is similar to following the crowd, rnit means you are happy not to make a decision but will accept the consensus – the collective decision of the many. At an unimportant level this may be just your easy-going nature saying I don’t mind if we go to the beachrnor the park or the cinema or the pub and that is harmless. It could also be about allowing your current thinking and situation, however unconventional, to take you where it will and this can be a useful exploration. However, to obediently follow the flow and not consider where your individual true meaning and purpose may lie is anythingrnbut harmless or useful. It is a surrender of personal responsibility and identity which can have significant life-long consequences. At this deeper level you need to disregard the general flow and concentrate on your own flow. Have you ever asked yourself when it is you’re at your happiest and most contented? Ever questioned what it is you do which brings about the most satisfaction, enjoyment and inner harmony? If you have really thought about this you will conclude it is not when engaged in temporary highs such as sex or alcohol or other forms of consumption. Admittedly, they may bring ephemeral pleasure butrnthey will not provide lasting, inner happiness. That will be found in an activity, vision, purpose or even just an idea that completely works for you, feels absolutely right and gives you inherent happiness and fulfilment without the need for external stimuli. That is when you arernin flow - your flow. You will have known and felt this yourself but psychiatric experiments back it up. They have shown we are at our happiest when involved in activities that hold the highest value for us. When completing these activities, we stop clock watching, we are genuinely absorbed and we are in a place where external worries are blocked out. We do notrnquestion or doubt whether what we are doing is right or workable and we seem to achieve or succeed without really thinking about it. rnPsychologists call this optimal experience or flow. Do not ignore this feeling as it is your key indicator in seeking your true purpose and subsequent happiness in life.rnYour flow will be personal to you. What intrigues you will bore another. What you find easy and are flowing in others will struggle and sweat over. Flow is also the natural order of things. Undertaking the task allotted to you which is the task that you do best is what happens inrnnature. You will recognize whether you are in flow by various emotions such as an inner contentment, an ordered and focused mind and clear objectives. There will be no internal dialogue of procrastination or justification, no doubts about whether you are doing the right thing.rnThe activity becomes automatic, you stop thinking and just do, and you do without conscious effort. Being in flow will give you a sense of purpose, meaning and knowledge of yourself all of which are vital components of happiness. Believe that the meaning of life, on the personal and most important level, is doing what is meaningful for you. Loving what you are doing most of therntime will enable you to love most of your time. ‘As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.’ Carl Jung. Action: Accept it can be difficult to be happy as external events have a tendency to conspire against it. But this is an even greater reason to seek your flow activities. Distinguish between true happiness and mere pleasure and think deeply about what your flow activities are.