Don't let anyone make you feel guilty

Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty

Have you heard statements like “If you love me, you would do this for me.” “You should be ashamed of yourself.” or “You hurt my feelings?” Statements like these are used by people to manipulate you into feeling guilty because you did a mistake, disappointed someone, or if some one wants a favor of you.

Don’t let someone make you feel guilty. Guilt is a destructive emotion that you waste your time with it if you don’t learn how to eliminate guilt for ever. To overcome and eliminate guilt from your life, do the following steps:

1. Know that the past can’t be changed. Whatever happened or you have done in the past, you can’t undo it or change it by feeling guilty. If you cry, weep, shout mornings and nights, you will not make the past different. It is better to concentrate on the present time and do something useful to enhance and improve your life and your future.

2. Try to learn from your experiences. If you hurt someone while not meaning it, apologize for what you have said or done and then forgive yourself. Learn from what happened in the past, so you won’t repeat it again, but it is important to forgive yourself.

3. Let the people you deal with know that you can’t be manipulated by what they say and can’t make you feel guilty. If your boss gives you a hard time because you didn’t work over time and start saying that there is no bonus for you to make you feel guilty, then you can say things like “that is perfectly fine. I will get the bonus next time.” Once people see that you are confident of yourself and can’t get manipulated by them into feeling guilty, they will know you are in control of your emotions.

To overcome guilt, you have to confront it. Don’t deny guilt or run away from it. Analyze it and make amends with it. No matter how much time you spend feeling guilty, you are not going to be able to change it because it has already happened. You can learn from the past, but you can’t change it.

Instead of feeling guilty over something that can’t be changed, why don’t you follow the above steps and then start concentrating on your goals?