Effective Conversation Through Listening

We have more real-time communication tools at our disposal. Communication tools range from mobile phones to the internet. The internet offers so many options such as social networking sites, e-mails, Skype and the list goes on. Listening attentively to the conversation at any particular time will ensure effective communication. In the past, we had telephones and telegrams. They were not readily available at our own disposal since they were immobile. One had to walk a distance in order to access telegram and telephone services. But those days are gone and we are in a new era of technology that ensures communication at any time. One of the most important tools of effective communication is actually silence. Silence will ensure that you listen to every word that is being said by the speaker. A bias of the mind, so to speak, is to conceptualize communication as purely proactive--talk, talk, talk replaces listening (hearing). Conversation is a two-way function. Careful listening will always make communication more effective. You have to do a lot of listening before you take the next step. Why do you think most women are complaining that men don't listen to them? I came across a quote and here I share it with you, "It's as if every conversation with a woman was a test, and men always failed it, because they always lacked the key to the code and so they never quite understood what the conversation was really about."-Orson Scott Card. Does your conversation with a woman seem like a test? Conversation is a two-way function. Listening will always make communication more effective. Dale Carnegie emphasized the point of listening in his best-selling book, 'How to Win Friends and Influence People.' While most people love to give in to the natural impulse to talk about themselves, it is often at the expense of alienating the audience. "Isaac F. Marcosson, a jou alist who interviewed hundreds of celebrities, declared that many people fail to make a favorable impression because they don't listen attentively. "They have been so much conce ed with what they are going to say next that they do not keep their ears open. Very important people have told me that they prefer good listeners to good talkers, but the ability to listen seems rarer than almost any other good trait." It is failure on your part to talk all about yourself ignoring the other person(s). People do have feelings therefore they should be treated kindly as human beings, more so when it comes to having a conversation with them. Listening attentively is the key to effective communication. Every conversation has to start somewhere. Someone has to start talking then others have to listen and thereafter give a feedback. Part of respecting other people actually involves listening attentively to what they have to say till they're through. A boring class is a good example of a challenge when it comes to attentive listening. Try listening closely to the lecturer. Notice the tone in his voice. Ask a question about the topic. By asking questions, you'll be creating interest within yourself in the topic and energizing the lecturer to make his lecturing more interesting. The boring class gets more lively. Children are also superb to listen to. They'll talk endlessly when they notice that the listener is interested on what they're saying. It is quite a lot of fun to ask questions of them to see what incredible and entertaining things they'll say next. One also will be amazed at how many astute observations children will often make. As the old saying goes, "From the mouths of babes..." The lesson is to engage oneself in a conversation by listening attentively. Be a diary for the words of others. If you ensconce yourself in the words of others, you'll get to know people better and this makes them to appreciate you.