Everything is possible in nature

I love being with nature, with trees, because of the way they relate. There is no "noise" in relationship with trees. There is no "little voice in my head", there are no stories, no "right way" to be, to talk, no "right thing to do". There is only space to be. There is no talking.

I realized recently that, while striving to remain present to who I really am, I fall again and again into the trap of focusing on the trauma that prevents me from being who I really am. I try to let go of it, clear it, work with it, open through it, heal it. Trauma is not who I am and yet trauma is what I write about, talk about, think about. Rather than simply being myself I am forever "trying to be myself".

But when I forget about the trauma there is space. No better way to say it. Space. Clear, open and endless. And I can do whatever I want because that space is me and I am that space.

It is not a space within existing reality or outside of it, it is not a space inside of my house, it is not a breathing space - it is a space, period. I can do whatever I want because there is nothing, literally nothing, to stop me. Because there is nothing there. Except for me.

This is the beauty of it - it is empty and I am there.

From this place all the stories, all the rules, all the limitations, all the “you can’t do this” or “this is not possible”, or "this is not how it works" are just things that people say. Nothing more than that, just things we say. The things we say belong to trauma, they belong to the noise. Without trauma nothing needs to be said.

This is why I love hanging out with nature so much, because nature doesn't say anything. It just is. It doesn't say anything therefore the “you can’t do this” or “this is not possible”, or "this is not how it works" simply doesn't exist.

This is also why I love fairy tales and never, ever read the “let me tell you how it is” kind of books. Because I can relate to fairy tales the same way I relate to life, to reality, as who I really am: there are no rules, no limits, nothing is impossible.
Everything is possible in a fairy tale. Everything is possible in nature. Everything is possible in life. And the only thing to do is to do whatever I want.