Four Spiritual Insights of Wisdom and Love in the Jerry Sandusky/Penn State Issue
As a survivor of child sexual abuse myself, I think it is good this issue is being brought into the light of day. I see a glaring inconsistency however, in the way the media, which reflects the general feeling of mainstream America, views the issue of child sexual abuse. While listening to several public discussions on the topic, I wanted to scream out as I listened, the "victim" is not the only victim! Please, can we take a breath and consider a different Perspective...
All people are born good people. But somewhere along the way, for reasons based in fear and powerlessness as a child, we let in malu, life-taking energies that take our power away wherever we are unconscious. We ALL have our areas of unconsciousness, places where we "check out" and end up dealing with the consequences of whatever energy "checked in", whether it's abuse of a substance, activity or another person. People who end up abusing children have become identified with an energy that is basically an "acting out" of a unconscious, deep sense of powerlessness which tries to compensate by taking power away from those who are weak or vulnerable. Yes, it is sick. It is ugly. It is vicious and abhorrent. It is all those things. But I submit to you, the abuser is just as much a victim as the victim.
Somewhere inside the abuser, they know what they are doing is all those things I mentioned. The problem is that they are compelled. As long as they are unconsciously identified with an energy that provides a way of filling the void of an absolutely intolerable sense of powerlessness, they are indeed powerless to change or stop it. This is the irony and the key to the problem and the solution.
What will work for us as a society is not to judge and demonize abusers. That will only drive that dark energy even further into hiding and invite even more life-taking energies: shame, guilt, deceit and denial to move right in and further hide the Divine Being who is lost and obviously not in control. Reference the interview of Jerry Sandusky when he was asked point-blank, "Are you a pedophile? Are you attracted to young boys?" He was clearly "not there"! Checked out!
The real irony here, and the place where I can bring some Clarity is #1, we are all Divine Beings, ie have goodness at our core and have gifts to bring to the Circle of Life, our Life Purpose. #2, people who see the "good side" of abusers often "check out" themselves when they get a glimpse of this person's malu with their own malu of fear and denial. In the case of Jerry Sandusky, the people around him respected him for his desire to help children with the charity he started. But when they began to notice things they really didn't want to acknowledge or deal with, they checked out too and inadvertently participated in the abuse, which can be almost as damaging as if they had done it themselves.
With the back drop of Penn. State to create major media attention, I for one appreciate, that this whole issue can begin a national, global discussion of what will really work for the Highest and Best of All Involved to finally shine enough Light to dissipate this dark, ugly energy for the protection of all children. But to judge the abusers, who are as much powerless victims of a compulsory activity as those of us who smoke or drink or eat or shop or gamble or any other life-taking activity we may be powerless to stop, change or control, is not the answer. In Huna we say Love is a "Doing Thing". So what is the Loving thing to do in this case?
The Loving Thing to do is:
Honor all Divine Beings. What we want are for people to get help and wake up. Instead of demonizing people it would work much better to view sexual abuse as the mental illness it really is.
Provide consequences because while we want these people to get help there must also be very firm and appropriate consequences to any action perpetrated against another person. If you see or know that someone is engaging in any abuse of a child, the most Loving thing you can do for the abuser, as well as the abused, is to IMMEDIATELY step up to stop the abuse and address the issue with the help of the appropriate support system in your community.
Believe children when they tell you things that are happening to them.
Pay attention to your own energy and don't fall prey to the malu of fear and denial. That is not love. It may be time for you to invoke the Akua of Wisdom, Courage and Strength. Make a Conscious Choice to DO LOVE.
Aloha, Kahunakarie
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Further Reading
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