Grief and Loss Counselling: How to Cope with the Death of a Loved One

Have you ever experienced grief so unyielding and persistent that there seem to be no end? The most familiar feeling mourners experience is being unable to find the confidence to face change, not enough dependable information to help cope with their loss and more importantly, not able to find a caring and understanding support group. These emotions may not be unusual for some grievers. There is a logical reason for this--before, educating people about how to deal with loss is almost non-existent. That, until a true major loss happens. Then the search begins when there comes a time when the emotional pressure of pain and stress rise on high levels. nnBut you know what, it's never really that late to explore those proven ways to cope with loss as long as you hold on steadfastly to your faith. And to discover that there's a wide extent of normalcy among grief and loss reactions and that in spite of your pain, you can still attain peace of mind by confronting those overwhelming emotions. 1.) You can begin the grief and loss counseling by thinking that it is just but normal and a practical thing to seek out the advice and comfort from others. Do not let pride get in the way and try reaching out with relatives and friends who have suffered the same loss and how they coped with grief. nnAsk questions and analyze the advantages and disadvantages of those answers, because there are just so much to learn there. You could then decide afterwards if you want to apply what you have heard or simply let it go. 2.) There were some negative myths about mourning that are very common. Here are some examples of those: grief just affects the emotions; that crying is just a sign of weakness; you should get over it in just a few weeks; you would be back in your old self once again; you’re supposed to let go of the person who died. nnBear in mind that some beliefs carry a strong effect on one’s behavior oftentimes without you being aware of it. It is at your own indulgence to dismiss such unhelpful beliefs. 3.) Be open and willing in joining a grief support group. Part of your grief and loss counseling is knowledge. And by joining this, knowledge will be abundant. You could learn so much from other grievers who are at various levels of their mourning. Also, those in sorrow seldom realize that aside from the major loss that they suffered, there are also some secondary losses that need to be considered. nnJoining a group gives you a sense of belonging that you are not alone in this painful journey. Seek advice and be open in talking about your feelings because there is this invisible connection that bonds you together in sympathy. 4.) Have an appointment with a grief counselor. Find a professional who acquired extensive experience and counseling load that specializes in grief and loss counseling. Do not just visit any counselor. Write up queries before going. The Association for Death Education and Counseling (www.adec.org) is another good resource for grief counselors in some areas.