Hatred

Among all human emotions hatred is the one that, in most cases, produces the most destructive consequences. However, if you really think about it, hatred is just a knee-jerk reaction caused by ignorance. You cannot truly hate a person if you have an understanding of the story behind that person’s actions. We all desire to have the gift of compassion not only for ourselves but for others as well. Although, having compassion may not be that easy to manifest given our behavior and judgment towards others. Judgment Versus Compassion To feel compassion, what is needed is understanding – having knowledge and empathy for the underlying reason to a person’s actions and behavior, may they be good or bad. On the other hand, when we make judgments about someone, we are forced to make many assumptions. After all, that’s the way people judge – we feel the need to base it on a set of standards which may not necessarily apply for all circumstances. We simply assume that the standards always apply. Let’s take this judgment statement for example: “She’s not supposed to be pregnant at sixteen.” What else do we know about her, aside from her being pregnant and being only sixteen? Could it be that her parents failed in guiding their daughter? rnDoes she even have parents or family at all? rnCould it be that she doesn’t have a family and having a child means she’d have one?rnIs it automatically a bad thing to be pregnant at sixteen? Bottom-line, we don’t really know in full what is involved in someone else’s life. Any answers we attempt are mere conjectures; what we think we know are just opinions. Should we pass judgment based on an opinion? Should we hate someone based on our limited assumptions? Understanding Leads To Compassion Having compassion is not the same as condoning someone’s wrong doing. It is simply a step further – going beyond judging a person towards having a better understanding of that person. Many of you would probably raise an eyebrow and think, “What about criminals?” Most of us know that violence is carried out by those who experienced it firsthand. Most of the heinous crimes are committed by those who suffered it themselves. Of course, that doesn’t justify the behavior nor does it absolve them from their offenses. Nevertheless, if we know their story then compassion would come easier. Even the judicial system which mostly focuses on setting penalties for criminals has provisions for compassion taking into account “good behavior”. What is relevant to us at this point is that our day-to-day judgments often lead to misunderstandings and hatred. This is because we judge solely on our own values, wants, needs and standards. Compassion is integral to our humanity. The next time we feel strongly judgmental against someone, clear your negative thoughts, seek understanding and turn it to compassion.