***Healing - An Excerpt from Nurturing Wellness through Radical Self-Care: A Living in Balance Guide and Workbook

I have chosen to share a philosophy of healing that was defined for me a year or so ago during meditation. This new way of thinking is going to change your life and the lives of those you love and cherish. You’ll change your self-talk and change the way you interact with members of your family when they are sick or suffering. It applies to the work you’ll encounter during your Nurturing Wellness through Radical Self-Care Program. You’ll have some new things to consider as you choose your strategies for a positive life jou ey. Every person alive is interested in the concepts of health and healing. Health determines the quality of our lives. The word “healing,” the way we usually think of it (but not the way we use it) indicates a positive change taking place within our mind, body, emotions, and spirit—or within our family system. But, if we are not careful, the word “healing” can take on negative implications. I am asking you to raise your level of awareness. Most of us feel we have to heal our emotional and physical wounds in order to achieve robust health. We feel that we have to draw upon outside resources in order to accomplish overall well-being. If we are sick or injured we are interested in our speed of healing, wanting to heal as quickly as possible. If we are anxious or depressed, we want those feelings to disappear. When asked how we feel about our illness or injury, we reply almost unconsciously using negative concepts that are deeply ingrained within our hearts and minds. Often our replies sound similar to these: • “I’m healing. I’ve been impatient, but I am gradually getting better.” • “I never thought I’d still be healing from this illness after all these months. I’m ready to go back to work, but I’m not quite up to it.” • “I’ve had better days. I’m tired all the time, and I nap a lot.” • “Why did I have to get so sick? I’m tired of being in the house all the time and tired of being a burden to my family.” Each time we think or speak the word “healing” in this way, we indicate that we are somehow broken or impaired by events such as surgery, the flu u, a car accident, an early life trauma, a fight with a family member, or the loss of a loved one. Think about the innocent words you and I might have spoken, completely unaware of their implications. Within the same sentence we’ve used the word “healing” in association with words like illness, suffering, and death to create what I refer to as a negative pairing. A negative pairing occurs when the word “healing” is placed with words related to a weakened state of being, disease, and suffering. Words like “illness” and “disease” are lower frequency words and perceived as negative, therefore carrying a negative emotional–physical impact. When we habitually pair a high- frequency, positive impact word like “healing” with low-frequency negative impact words, we inhibit our mental–physical–spiritual ability to heal. Negative phrases such as, “this illness has been exhausting” reinforce the fact that your illness has lasted a long time and you’ve had to fight your way through it. “I am finally healing” might be said to mean, “I was so sick I thought I was going to die.” Our carelessly spoken words actually reinforce our suffering and support our current perception of suffering. They remind us of our emotional–physical struggle with illness, feeding our mind and body negative messages about the ability to heal. Each time you innocently say words similar to those above, you may be slowing your recovery in any current and all subsequent illnesses by declaring, “I’m a slow healer” and “illness threatens me.” The more positive we are, the more we pair positive words and concepts together. The more we pair positive words and concepts together, the healthier we become. Healing is not about recovery from illness, surgery, or divorce. It is about our virtues, or the positive aspects of self: acceptance, wellness, joy, kindness, love, tenacity, vigor, tende ess, and compassion. When we embrace our virtues and incorporate their energy into our perception of life, we uncover our capacity for wholeness and wellness. Discovering and embracing our inner light, our potential, is the true spirit of healing. It is the realization of this empowered healing spirit, this limitless potential that I want to share with you. Healing is achieved through: Turning on the light of your soul and allowing it to shine. Living from your heart center and within the awareness of your own light. Living within high frequency virtues that support and sustain a positive, robust life. Trusting in the process of life and trusting your own wisdom. Filling your mind with positive thought. (See a full list of virtues on page 219.) Here are some examples of how you might put your new definition and philosophy of healing into use. Rather than say “I am finally healing from the flu,” it is much better to say “My body is strong and getting stronger every day.” Instead of saying “The worst is behind me now, and I continue to heal from my injury,” it is more positive to say “My body is a miracle and very good at its job.” By changing the way you express yourself, you begin to use positive words to define your healing and recovery. You’ll learn to do this as you use this program to unleash your internal power and your inner peacefulness.