How do I Handle Jealousy

Jealousy is the result of our feelings when we have a personal problem with a possession, or a perceived possession, or position that another person has. The jealous man or woman may feel that he or she is more deserving of the possession and has more ownership rights. In my opinion the jealous person has lower self esteem. I say that because the man or woman of high self esteem won’t be so attached to one idea or concept. The jealous person doesn’t have the confidence to move on to the next concept or to understand that there is more that they can do in life. The confident man or woman realizes that he or she can recover whatever the perceived loss happened to be and is not so easily disturbed by the prospect of loss. We are all subject to attacks of jealousy or envy from time to time but the mature person will very quickly recover and move on. Confidence comes with time and experience. If you are comfortable with who you are you should never be ruled by envy. If you have been around for any period of time you know that there are better things in life than whatever the current fad happens to be. We have all heard stories about the jealous spouse who has threatened to kill the partner before they allowed them to belong to someone else. This is a reaction motivated by fear. The only reason that these people are so fearful about losing another is that they don’t have any faith in their ability to find another mate or spouse. This fear is borne out of low self esteem. The confident person is used to positive reactions from others and has do doubt or question in their mind about finding another mate. When we are led by what others think we don’t have real confidence in our own abilities. The key is to develop a confidence in your abilities. Maybe you will have to give yourself some small victories to begin with. Learn how to not fall for the subtle tricks that people use to control your thoughts and emotions. Ignore the small nuances that you have been falling for all of these years. Learn to look people in the eye without wavering. Develop what the military calls a command voice. In other words talk to people like you mean what you are saying. People respond to the tone of voice that you use when you converse with them. If you sound timid they will not have respect for your words. I recently penned an article which I titled “You are more than just a maid.” Regardless of your station in life or your present condition you are just as important as the next person. Learn to be led by the beat of your own drum rather than the opinions of others. Don’t value the thoughts of others about who you are over the facts that you know about yourself. Don’t be shaken by the thoughts and opinions of other people because you think that they are smarter or wiser than you are. Many times the jealous person loses out because he or she wants to cling too tightly to something that may not necessarily be theirs. The confident person knows that there is more out there than where that one came from and that they are capable of getting it. Recognize putdowns when they occur and learn to not respond to them. Take control of your own life and you won’t have to worry about what others have accomplished in life. Riceland Enterprises