How To Find Happiness In Marriage: Relationships Thrive On Personal Responsibility

Never underestimate the role of personal responsibility in marriage. Relationships do not replace our personal responsibility for our own happiness. You make yourself happy or unhappy in your relationship. Help yourself out of marital dissatisfaction by adhering to the following marriage advice: accept total responsibility for your happiness. Marriage tips seem to abound these days, yet rarely is this particular bit of relationship advice given the attention it truly deserves.
Making your spouse responsible for how you feel turns the potential for a great marriage into an impossible dream.

However your mate behaves, you choose your own path of action. When you feel happy, nothing bothers you, including your marriage. Relationships, like every other area of life, have a wonderful way of working out when we feel happy. Happiness operates like an ordering force in our lives.

Why make choices that make you unhappy in your marriage? Relationships require work, but they also require some letting go. When you want freedom from an unhappy marriage help yourself to it by choosing an enjoyable course of action.

Instead of focusing on what your partner has done "wrong", consider what you can do for yourself right now. Recognize when the way that you are attempting to improve your marriage is making you miserable. You can then begin to improve how you deal with your marriage.
Relationships stop bothering us so much when we stop bothering ourselves so much.

Your unhappiness departs as you rely upon, and thereby exercise and develop, your ability to lead yourself along a path of fulfillment. When you feel unhappily married, it is not your mate, but your way of living, that you need to improve.
Marriage-satisfaction demands letting go of any agonizing struggle to control our mate.

No one wants an unhappy marriage. Relationships, however, cannot make us happy. Sometimes we enjoy relationship harmony; sometimes we feel desperate for relationship help. For a happy marriage, for a great marriage, remain committed to doing what makes you feel truly good deep down inside.
Essential wisdom for a happy marriage: Relationships cannot save you from the habitual ways that you make yourself miserable.

The real cause of your sorrow lies in where you focus your attention. Since it is your attention, it is your responsibility to direct it in line with what makes you happy. If you habitually think about your marriage, relationships with others, or any other aspect of your life in ways that upset you, it is your mental focus that you need to change.
Your happiness requires your devotion to your happiness. Don't try to improve your marriage or relationships with others in ways that make you unhappy.

Your happy marriage requires your devotion to your happiness. Don't struggle to improve a marriage in ways that make you unhappy.

When you feel disturbed by your mate, avoid focusing on what your mate has done to sabotage your hope for a happy marriage. Relationships require a more responsible direction of attention than that. Fulfill your personal responsibility for your happiness by directing your focus with the following questions:

* How am I feeling? Is that how I want to feel?
* What am I thinking about? Is that what I want to think about?
* What am I saying (and how am I saying it)? Is that making me feel better or worse?
* What am I doing and how am I doing it? Is that making me happy?

Then ask yourself the next two questions to direct yourself along a happier path:

* How do I want to feel right now?
* What can I do to help me feel that way?

These self-reflective questions can help you access more power to find a more joyful path in every area of life, including marriage and relationships in general.