How To Get Your Man To Talk More

When you are in a relationship, there are many things that are important to make it work, to make it grow, and thrive. As with anything else in life, you must strive to build your relationship and make it healthy. And, one of the key aspects to a relationship is communication. For, if you can not talk and speak openly to each other, you can never grow truly close and find a lasting relationship. Yet, you may find it difficult to draw certain things out of your man. It is said that, these days, men are more open and sensitive. Well, that may be true to some extent, but political correctness aside, men are still men, and they often don’t speak their minds. So, how can you get the man in your life to speak more openly about his feelings and emotions? Well, there are a few tips to follow. First, turn off the television, Playstation, Xbox etc. The male mind does best when it can focus on one thing. Trying to talk to your man while he is watching a football game or the latest “Die Hard” movie is a recipe for not talking at all; all you will get are a bunch of “yups”, “nopes”, etc. Next, try to talk about one thing. Here again, the male mind does best if it can focus on one subject. Also, if you can mix up the subjects you want to speak about, and throw in some light and casual topics; that will help also. You may want to talk to him about love, marriage, children, visiting our family etc. But, if all you talk about is serious matters, you’re going to turn him off to talking altogether. Consider the lesson of Dr. Pavlov and his work with dogs. He found that a conditioned response could be set up with a dog. Well, men are often compared to dogs, but they aren’t quite so crude; however, they do respond to stimuli in a similar fashion. By talking to your man about sports, sex, and so forth, he will come to see talking as something to enjoy, not dread. Also, when talking to your man, position, demeanor, body language, and even the clothes you wear can influence how he reacts. Men don’t do their best communicating when they’re sitting facing someone. It is rather confrontational. Here again, it all goes to biology, and the primitive aspects of the human brain. Where once men had to face off in battle for food, for a mate etc. and thus they see such a position as an act of aggression. So, if you want to talk to him, and make him feel at ease, try sitting next to him. Next, there is the art of compromise. Remember that if you talk and yet do not really talk, merely dictate, yell or belittle your man, you are not going to encourage him to talk. This goes back to the idea of not talking on serious matters all the time. Respect his opinion, even if you do not agree with it, and tell him so. If you disagree on some point, seek to compromise on it. And, most importantly, before arguing or exploding at him, ask this question: in twenty years, will this issue be all that important? If the answer is no, consider letting it go. Always remember, a relationship is a two way street, not one. The more you’re willing to talk about things he wants to talk about, the more you’re willing to change your views, and to listen to what he has to say; the more likely he is to talk more.