Article

How To Overcome Rejection By Family

Topic: Attitude and PerspectiveFeaturing Ronald NzimoraPublished August 26, 2008

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Hi friend,

I was just thinking about what i wanted to blog on today and I said to myself, “Why don’t i talk about a recent challenge I’m currently passing through in my own life right now?

The truth is right now things arent that rosy for me. No, I didnt go bankrupt. I just got rejected by my own family- for dropping out of college.

I hated that school, oh my God how I hated being there. I hated the town, the lecturers, the students (except my close friends of course) and because of all that I was on self-destruct mode. I kept on doing things to get me expelled. I joined a cult, cheated in the examinations, beat up people, extorted money, sold drugs, and a whole lot more.

Yeah, I got suspended for a year and made the mistake of going back because my Dad threatened me. Then for the next three years, I wasted my life away, even writing my degree project but then I summomned up the courage to quit. And I did.

I turned my back on 8 years of waste, hatred and failure. But my family killed me, literally. My younger sister felt she was better tha
I was because she finished college and got a job in a bank. My father simply hated the sight of me. For over four months I was without money, and a hope in the world.

It’s been a couple of months since. My father still hates me. My sister still thinks the worst of me. I’m really suprised they havemt asked me to get out the house yet, which my sister pays for. And believe me I would gladly if only I had a place to go to.

I’m getting back on my feet though. I atteneded a seminar where I have learnt how to use my writing skills to make money selling information products. I am so ecited i can see the potential. and I’m placing my second newspaper advert tomorrow.

The worls is our oyster. Yes it is really.

No matter how many times and how much you are rejected, i want you to HAVE FAITH!

Don’t despair and don’t give up! Everyone will criticize you and tell you hurtfull things to bring your spirit down. They will call you an idiot, a bum and a nobody. But don’t get lost in it all. You can live through then pain and through the disgrace. Just follow these steps:

1. Believe in yourself

The greatest challenge you’ll face is keeping your faith in yourself. Don’t let anyone or anything make you lose your belief. Nothing happens unless first a belief in yourself. Without thisYou’ll succumb to the pressure and fail.

The truth is they wil say you will not be anybody worth becoming if you follow your heart. That’s a BIG lie! People who say this are only afraid to listen to their own hearts and will do everything in their power to make sure you too don’t.

2. Have a visio

The worst thing you can do when you’ve decided to damn the consequences and follow your heart’s desire is to not have a clearcut vision of where you want your life to be headed, where you want to be. You must have a perfect picture in your mind of what your life will be like when you have overcome your present hiccups. Otherwise you’ll just prove your critics right because without a clear vision you’ll fail. It’s as simple as that.

3. Look for a mentor- FAST!

This is what many people who have failed neglected to do. Look for a mentor, someone who has achieved what it is you want to do and ask them to spare a few minutes of their week teaching you the ropes. You have to ask nicely otherwise they wont budge.

A mentor will keep you focused and motivated and more importantly help you avoid mistakes in your race to the top. Having a mentor is the greatest secret of success that is never told. When you have a mentor, you will be much more stronger mentally and spirtually and cam face the rejection by your family and live through it to tell the tale.

4. Don’t hate them back

I made this mistake. but then I read a book which explained to me that I was hurting myself if I hated. So i stopped. I still feel the anger somewhat, but then I know that I cant hate if I want to heal. Yes, that’s true. you can’t heal, you can’t succeed and you can’t win if you hate. So no matter how many times they curse, you, taunt you, scream at you, do anything, DON’T hate.

Well, that’s it for now. If you’ll just follow these guidelines, you’ll overcome any kind of rejection. As the old saying in my village of Umudara, in Ihiala Town, of Anambra State, Nigeria goes, “Onye ajuru aju anaghi aju onwe ya.” That’s Ibo language and means “The rejected person shouldn’t reject himself/herself.” I hope you don’t, ok?

I wish you more love and success in your life.

Ronald

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