How You Can Teach Your Kids To Be Resilient

resiliencyMimi Is My Name and Positive Words Are My Game!

A few years back I was trying to help one of my grandkids figure out how to ride a scooter. He is the youngest and was getting pretty frustrated because his older cousins could ride one and he couldn't. I actually got on the dang thing and tried to show him, which was interesting! I can barely walk down the hall without bumping into something!

Of course, he kept saying, "I can't do it!" To which I finally said, "That's it! I don't want to hear you say 'I can't' again! You CAN do it, you just need to practice." As he continued to practice I wouldn't let him say, "I can't" again. Which led to a new response, "ok, I'll try". I immediately put a ban on saying "I'll try" as well.

My business mentor will catch me and call me out also. I am not allowed to say I will "try" anything. (Yes, I still blow it from time to time ; ) Think about it. Why would you "try"? Either do it, or don't.

I wanted him to begin to understand that our words mean something! When we continue to say things like, "I can't", or "I'll try", we are basically sabotaging ourselves. Why would our subconscious try to help us work out the problem if we already believe we can't do it?

Our kids need someone to teach them resiliency. We can do this by first understanding how negativity hurts us, and how positivity helps us. Then we can be an example to our kids.

resiliencyBrain Function and Resiliency

It's about learning to use empowering words and training our minds to be problem solvers. Do my grandkids necessarily like it when I make them stop saying negative things? Of course not! Have they learned how to do things with practice? You bet! Will they forget the lessons? Nope!

According to a great article, Words Can Change Your Brain, on Psych Central, positive words, such as “peace” and “love,” can alter the expression of genes, strengthening areas in our frontal lobes and promoting the brain’s cognitive functioning. They propel the motivational centers of the brain into action, according to the authors, and build resiliency.

According to Andrew Newberg, M.D. and Mark Robert Waldman, a single negative word can fire up our fear center which releases hormones and neurotransmitters that messes with our brain function.

According to the doctors that created the study:

By holding a positive and optimistic [word] in your mind, you stimulate frontal lobe activity. This area includes specific language centers that connect directly to the motor cortex responsible for moving you into action. And as our research has shown, the longer you concentrate on positive words, the more you begin to affect other areas of the brain. Functions in the parietal lobe start to change, which changes your perception of yourself and the people you interact with. A positive view of yourself will bias you toward seeing the good in others, whereas a negative self-image will include you toward suspicion and doubt. Over time the structure of your thalamus will also change in response to your conscious words, thoughts, and feelings, and we believe that the thalamic changes affect the way in which you perceive reality.

Can you see how important it is for us think before we speak, and teach our children and grand children the importance of the words they use in relation to themselves, or to other children?

resiliencyPositive Words Are Almost Magical

Our words have tremendous creative or destructive energy. In the Psychology Today article, "The Most Dangerous Word in the World", we should choose our positive words carefully and say them slowly because the brain doesn't respond as quickly to positive words as it does to negative ones.

The same article says, positive words and thoughts propel the motivational centers of the brain into action and they help us build resilience when we are faced with life’s problems. According to Sonja Lyubomirsky, one of the world’s leading researchers on happiness, if you want to develop lifelong satisfaction, you should regularly engage in positive thinking about yourself, share your happiest events with others, and savor every positive experience in your life.

We have the opportunity to teach our kids a very special skill for resiliency. Of course, we have to remember that it doesn't work to do as I say, they will follow our lead. We must learn to be loving, positive and kind to ourselves. Those little eyes are always watching.

Business mentors and coaches are an excellent source of encouragement and truth. I couldn't have learned all I needed to build my business without my mentors, at least not in this decade! If you would like to discover how you can benefit from an entrepreneurial academy that will provide all the skills you need to build a successful online business from scratch click the link below.

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