How are you Feeling? Prescription for Emotional Healing

How Are You Feeling?rnPrescription for Emotional Health This article is to introduce people to the basics on how to understand and manage our emotions. rnEveryone has feelings but not everyone may know what they really are or how to deal with them in conscious productive ways. This article will explore the nature and dynamics of emotions. . rnHOW ARE YOU FEELING? Prescription for Emotional Healthrn We cannot ignore or hide our feelings. Everything we do is fueled by our emotions. They give meaning to our life and add depth to our experiences. Emotions are our life line that keep us connected so we can build healthy relationships and lead productive lives. However, feelings are often neglected and misunderstood. The key to emotional fitness is to be able to recognize and respect our feelings as well as to express them appropriately in healthy, constructive ways. Emotional baggage will keep us stuck the past and drain us of precious energy in the present. First and foremost, feelings are not good or bad. They just are. They are part of our inner reality which include the full range of emotions from joy to sadness. You cannot choose to suppress an undesirable feeling and expect to select only the good ones. Emotional health does not imply always being happy. It's about being able to deal and embrace all the emotions. By continuously denying our feelings, we end up feeling numb. Eventually, you will seek out artificial ways such as gambling, drinking or using drugs to help create those feelings of being alive. People spend a lot of resources, time and energy in holding back their feelings. The essence of communication is being honest to yourself which in turn will lead to better understanding and communicating with others. Give yourself permission to experience and to express your feelings. Feelings are not a sign of weakness. There is a false sense of security in trying to "control" our emotions. Emotions actually control us.It takes great courage and strength to be in touch with our feelings and to not be afraid to show them. If we look at Oprah, her mass appeal is due to the fact that she shows the world that she, too, is vulnerable and human. Feelings are personal messages. Pay attention to this vital information you need to act on. Allow the feeling to flow, to be expressed. Most of the pain we suffer comes from resisting and not letting go. Getting in touch with your true feelings may require work but it will cost you more to go against the flow and try to suppress it. You can't push the river, but you can "grow" with the flow. People do not make us feel bad, guilty, sad or happy. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." We own our feelings and we need to take responsibility. Stop denying and blaming. Re-acting is just doing the same old thing you've always done in the past. Responding is choosing to do something different in the present. Give up being the victim. Free yourself and move on feeling connected and equipped to handle life's challenges. Prerequisites for Emotional Healing Being present - Make time and space for yourself so you can quiet the mind and listen to your heart. If you are looking for answers to your questions, you need to be able to be present in order to pick up and reflect on the incoming information. Keeping busy and making noise is a good way to keep the emotions away and dampen the pain. Meditation, quiet time and journalling are great tools for alleviating this. Being relaxed - getting rid of daily tensions gives you easier access to your feelings. The breath is the fundamental core to learning how to relax and to being in your body. Your feelings live in your body as sensations. So get out of your head and into your body. You cannot think your feelings, you need to take a deep breath, relax & FEEL them now Being true to your feelings - Denial and distortion will keep you stuck in the past. The truth shall set you free. In therapy, the healing can begin once you can acknowledge and validate what you are feeling. In order to facilitate emotional awareness you need to start identifying old, self-defeating behavioral patterns and self-limiting beliefs. Grant yourself the permission to feel in nonjudgmental ways. In order to feel our emotions, we need to accept them and be willing to let them go. This will permit the free flow of energy to heal us. Exploring the Dynamics of Basic Emotions ANGERrn When someone steps on your toes and you have been hurt, you need to stand up for yourself. Yours rights have been violated, your boundaries have been crossed and your needs have not been met. rnMESSAGErn Anger protects and defends you by supplying the energy required to express the underlying hurt when its occurs. Unexpressed anger is where we add insult to injury. The longer we hold anger in, the more damage it can cause. ANTIDOTErn Assertiveness. Take responsibility for your feelings, thoughts and actions. Stop blaming everyone and everything. Since anger is a very strong emotion full of energy, you need to do something physical; get up and dance, yell, scream, punch a bag, jog. Learn stress management techniques. After you have cooled down, follow up with conflict resolution. Establish your boundaries, stand up for your rights and speak out. Look for re-solutions so that all parties involved can reach a win-win situation and bottom line, have your needs met. FEARrn We all have a built-in survival mechanism designed to alert us that something may be difficult or dangerous. Our response to the perceived threat is to "Fight or Flight". This extra energy supply is meant to serve and protect you. Fear becomes the signal to go, not to stop. Self-doubt will keep you stuck in your comfort zone and basically from avoiding life experiences. MESSAGErn When you see fear, don't stop, take caution and then jump right into the opportunity to grow and become stronger. Fears don't go away by themselves, nor can you hide from them. rnANTIDOTE Self Confidence. Flex those courage muscles by facing and conquering your fears. Taking a risk is saying "Yes, I can do it". A major roadblock to success in life is not having faith in yourself and in your ability to handle life's challenges. ANXIETY Anticipation and expectation of loss or injury in the future. Anxiety is created by putting the focus on the negative things that could possibly happen in the future. Trying to predict and control the uncontrollable is investing in a lose-lose battle. Anxiety is a warning signal that alerts you of impeding dangers, so get prepared to defend yourself. If this heightened sense of awareness is not resolved and you keep avoiding the situation, it will eventually cause more anxiety, burnout and panic. MESSAGE These anxious feelings are not bad or fatal, they are just uncomfortable. Time to become more present in your life and evaluate your negative thinking patterns that lead you to pressing those panic buttons. This malfunction causes failure to take the necessary action. Make the conscious choice to start responding in new positive, healthy ways instead of reacting with the same old negative way. rnANTIDOTE R-E-L-A-X the body and mind. By letting go of tension, you can choose to be present and stop worrying about the future. Be positive. Trust in your ability to handle whatever comes your way. Let go of the need to control. "This too shall pass." SADNESS MESSAGE This period of withdrawal is an opportunity for introspection. Mourn the loss and digest the experience. As you go through the grieving process, your energy will return and make you ready for a new beginning. By honoring those feelings of sadness, you will discover what you need. ANTIDOTErn Give yourself the permission and the time to adjust to your significant loss. Feeling sad can actually feel good, so go ahead and cry. Feel the relief as you come to let go and ultimately move into a happier place where you can appreciate life and feel enriched by your experience. rnDEPRESSION Unprocessed griefs lead to depression and depletion of energy. Depression is a much older and deeper feeling. It shows a pattern of avoiding feelings and low self-esteem. MESSAGE Time to wake up. Life is urging you to figure out what is important to you. Opportunity to re-evaluate your life and to address those things you have been avoiding so you can gain a greater understanding of who you are and what you want. In order to have more life and energy, you need to look at what's blocking you and examine those buried feelings. ANTIDOTE? Redefine your life. Declutter your mind. Time to sort out feelings and get to the heart of the matter. As you identify your losses, make sure you take the time to mourn them in order to finally be able to process them, let go and move on to attain a new level of understanding and meaning in your life. Make it your daily prerogative to do things that will make you feel good about yourself.