How To Raise Your Self Esteem

Few people realize that the best way to achieve your goals of happiness and success is simply through raising your self esteem. It’s surprising nowadays how many people genuinely suffer from very low self esteem, and it’s a problem that most people feel holds them back from enjoying their lives and achieving their goals and ambitions. Most people feel like their self esteem cannot be changed, and that if it’s low it’s likely to remain low, but this is simply not true, the great thing about your self esteem is that you can improve it yourself, no matter how low you feel it is.

Most people assume that self esteem is how high your confidence is, where this is somewhat true, it is not entirely the case. Self confidence does come into it, but your self esteem as a whole is a lot more than this. There are, in fact, many people throughout the world who are very confident yet have very low self esteem, people who often fall into this category tend to be singers, actors and comedians, who often give off an aura of confidence on stage, yet off stage they feel insecure. The word ‘esteem’ itself is actually Latin, and means ‘to estimate’ therefore, self esteem is how you estimate yourself as a person. In order to do this, there are 5 questions you must ask yourself, and the answers will dictate your self-esteem.

These questions are:
Am I deserving of love?
Do I think that I am a good human being?
Am I deserving of happiness?
Deep down, do I feel that I am a good person?
And finally, Do I like myself?

Those who find it hard to answer any of those questions with ‘yes’ are often sufferers of poor self esteem. If you found that you answered many of these questions with ‘no’ then you’re not alone, and there are things that you can do in order to improve your self esteem as well as your quality of life.

The first step is to simply take on board that you are a wonderful and special, and there is nobody in the world like you, you are completely unique, all your thoughts and feelings are all your own and you are the only one in control. This means that out of a total of over six billion people in the whole world, you are a one-off creation and completely original. So surely, if you are the only one of you on the whole planet, then surely you should feel and accept that you have just as much right as any other person to be on this earth? It’s an unusual way of looking at it, but this simple first step can often open up your eyes to the world around you and your originality.

The second thing is to realize that you are entitled to make mistakes, just like anyone else, the only way we learn is by getting things wrong before we get them right, do stop being so hard on yourself, you’re only human and you have the right to make mistakes sometimes. Respect yourself and allow yourself to make these mistakes, and above all, don’t beat yourself up afterwards.

There are a few other things you can do that might help you to realize the positives about yourself and raise your self esteem. One popular technique is the ’50 things I like about me’ list, this list is something you need to write yourself and if you’re severely lacking in self esteem it could take you quite a while, but persevere, don’t try and write it if you’re having a particularly low or bad day, take time out when you’re feeling okay and create a list of things that you like about yourself. Having this list is a great thing to come back to, as you start to think throughout your day about the different things you may not have realized that you do that you like about yourself. It’s sounds unusual, but it’s worth a go, and it can work wonders. You can write anything from your characteristics, your looks, even the nice things you do from day to day. Once it’s completed, keep it somewhere that you can see it and be constantly reminded that you have many good qualities. Once you’ve reached 50 comes the hard part, try and add to it every so often, for the rest of your life, in order to constantly remind yourself of the good things you do from day to day.

Self esteem can be awkward to raise, especially if yours is particularly low, but it can be done, and starting small is the best thing you can do. Try these tips, and you might be surprised about the difference it makes on the short and long term.

If this seems too difficult to accomplish by yourself, you may need the assistance of a coach. A coach will help you stay on task, see things about yourself that you don't see, guide you and motivate you to discover who you really are and all you can accomplish when you believe in yourself. Who needs a coach? We all do!