Article

Is Porn Addiction a real addiction?

Topic: Addiction and RecoveryPublished November 14, 2011

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Do you or someone you feel affection for have a porn addiction? There is lots of deliberation as to whether someone has a porn addiction or if it is merely a compulsive behavior. But I think that debate is senseless. Call it an addiction, call it a bad inclination, call it whatever you want. If someone has uncontrollable feelings and they are acting out in ways that they can’t seem to get under control, they have a problem. And trying to bring to a halt this behavior on their own is almost unfeasible. As Einstein said: No problem can be solved by the same mind that created it. For the person with a porn addiction, they need outside help. If they knew how to stop this behavior on their own, they would have stopped it by now. But the challenge is that there is so much humiliation around this behavior that most people that we would consider to have a porn addiction won’t reach out for help on their own. In fact, one study showed that of the men that sought help for sexual addiction, only 9% did it on their own. The other 91% did it because another person was encouraging them (and from time to time pushing them!) It is so strange that we expect people to biologically have the meansto get themselves out of trouble. I suppose its merely human nature. But the fact is that whether or not someone wants to admit that they take part in a porn addiction, or they just can’t stop looking at it, they probably won’t be able to stop on their own. They just don’t own the tools. Its kind of like giving them a hammer and telling them to go build a dwelling. They will do fine throughout the framing. That hammer will really come in handy. But when it comes time for the plumbing, they will end up with some leaky pipes. And when they try to put the windows in, forget it. If you really want to give someone help for addiction, you have to give them new tools. And odds are, you probably don’t have those tools either. If you did, you wouldn’t be reading this! If you want to know how to cure an addiction, it should focus on creating new routine around healthy living. See, the porn addiction is a symptom. Its not necessarily the foremost issue. It gives them a way to break out from life. It gives them a fantasy world where they can run from their feelings. In order to create a long term solution, you have to get rid of the imbalance that is causing them to run away. When you fix the roots, the leaves take care of themselves.

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