Is This Accident Your Fault?

Have you ever been in a car accident? It is not a pleasurable experience and it could result in considerable damages and injuries to you or someone else. I bring this topic up because it has become interesting to me to observe the different ways that we drive our vehicles and how it could affect the way we approach other areas of our lives. In essence I am suggesting that our driving patterns may be quite similar to other aspects of our lives or vice versa.

One type of driving might be what I call "driving by default" which is when a person drives from one place to another completely oblivious as to how they got there. Many of us drive "by default" with no intent for the trip nor intentions for safety. Driving in this manner of oblivion can in fact cause us to have responses to other drivers based on reactions and not necessarily intentions for wellbeing and happiness. Our lives are like this when we do not focus on the here and now and most importantly the ride itself. Being present in the moment will help us to enjoy the ride and see the sites along the way.

Another type of parallel to driving is the rear-view mirror approach to life. We tend to focus on what is behind us so much that we do not see the road ahead, nor do we care for our future because we are stuck in the past. This type of driver typically will experience remorse over what happened, or rather did not happen, to cause them pain and disappointment. There may even be the concept here that your life back then was more fun or fulfilled than it is now. That may be true, but one can never pursue the future by looking back. A great quote on this topic is that "to fix your past you must begin to correct the future."

One of my favorite similarities of driving to the way we live our lives is sometimes called the back-seat driver. The back-seat driver knows what is best for everyone else because they are so focused on the driver and not themselves. A back-seat driver finds criticism all too easy for the driver and almost always knows a better route than the one the driver is taking. A driver's response to a back-seat driver directing their path is always similar to the one our family members give us when we try to tell them how to live their lives. It is one of reproach and anger for not allowing them to be themselves and make their own choices.

There are other driving similarities to living life such as an aggressive driving approach, defensive driving and my favorite, the "Sunday driver." Think about the way you typically drive on a daily basis and how this parallels with your own life. If you are a driver who drives by default then start setting intentions for your drive to be safe and pleasant. You can also set intentions for your life in the same manner. If you are a driver who looks back at the past such as in the rear-view mirror approach to life then point your sites forward and look at the road ahead. The experience is not what has been lived but what is yet to be discovered. Lastly, if you are directing the lives of others through a back-seat driving approach, then begin to allow them to have their own choices. I paraphrase a familiar affirmation from Louise Hay in reminding you to allow others to experience what is meaningful to them while you experience what is meaningful to you.