Is Your Partner Married to His or Her Office?

Is Your Partner Married To His/Her Office?

The signs are all there…

Your partner always seems preoccupied, he/she is getting late-night email alerts, is obsessively checking for new text messages.

In the past this could only mean one thing, but in today’s technologically-driven world what this often can mean is that your partner is in the midst of a love affair with his/her iphone or blackberry (or other such device).

We (unfortunately/fortunately depending on your perspective) no longer need to be office-bound to be getting work done.

Great for productivity..bad for personal relationships.

It’s now easier than ever to bring the stresses of work home and to stay connected to the workplace.

This not only impacts on our individual stress levels in this fast-paced technological world, but also can negatively affect our relationships.

Are you tired of playing second fiddle to a sleek, sophisticated younger model? Wondering what this wireless device has got that you don’t to captivate your partner’s attention?

Solving this increasingly common relationship complaint is a two-sided affair.

Number 1: Your partner needs to be aware of how problematic this is for you.
Number 2: You both need to come up with a solution to solve this.

You’re the only one who can alert your partner to what is troubling you, and once you’ve done this it’s time to work at it.

It may not be as simple as your partner simply shutting off at the end of the workday, as much as you’d both like this to happen, as perhaps he/she has a very demanding job.

If this is the case, what you can do is to look for solutions together to rectify his/her work/personal life balance. As an example, if the job requires after-hours work to be done, how about suggesting that your partner schedule a specific time-slot in the evenings to do this work. Perhaps checking email only within this time slot instead of receiving instantaneous email alerts would help too.

To Greater Intimacy,
Rachel Moheban, LCSW